tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37448554184996718432024-03-18T19:57:19.637-07:00Interlocutora InvisívelInterlocutora invisívelAnahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.comBlogger82125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-23434471643128287852022-04-13T04:06:00.002-07:002022-04-13T04:06:06.816-07:00Walking Meditation<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN25VrSr9gDm8yDiO_SrXILRUjJ6e5Ps3PdK9mTh2hOPa82I7Yp5LFANRN0LopVLCXnykIlOcie9-cOceraoGly3t2KeQMUWJmYcbN18BsjIp5XzsuZDGbHd4giGfwAzXh6om-FRt3YlHyk8COBRa9ggNNf4DqGIPBr9gJuT9M-TAyscKUbQQ2dEhl/s12032/sea%20shell.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="8000" data-original-width="12032" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN25VrSr9gDm8yDiO_SrXILRUjJ6e5Ps3PdK9mTh2hOPa82I7Yp5LFANRN0LopVLCXnykIlOcie9-cOceraoGly3t2KeQMUWJmYcbN18BsjIp5XzsuZDGbHd4giGfwAzXh6om-FRt3YlHyk8COBRa9ggNNf4DqGIPBr9gJuT9M-TAyscKUbQQ2dEhl/w640-h426/sea%20shell.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><p>That day I went for a walk with my daughter. I was wearing her. I was kind of forced to go. I figured that if I stayed indoors I would go mad. </p><p>Read more <a href="That day I went for a walk with my daughter. I was wearing her. I was kind of forced to go. I figured that if I stayed indoors I would go mad." target="_blank">here</a>. </p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-7811416124972073462022-04-12T05:35:00.007-07:002022-04-12T05:36:51.014-07:002 movies that still make me think about the gender of perfection<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><p class="pw-post-body-paragraph jm jn ii jo b jp jq jr js jt ju jv jw jx jy jz ka kb kc kd ke kf kg kh ki kj ib gj" data-selectable-paragraph="" id="9cee" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: inherit; color: #292929; font-family: charter, Georgia, Cambria, "Times New Roman", Times, serif; font-size: 20px; letter-spacing: -0.003em; line-height: 32px; margin: 2em 0px -0.46em; text-align: start; word-break: break-word;">There are movies that never really leave you, not necessarily because you loved them, but because something about them "itches". I’ve been thinking about two of those that I first watched a few… well, many moons ago. Check out my latest publication <a href="https://medium.com/@Dr_Ana_Martins/2-movies-that-still-make-me-think-about-the-gender-of-perfection-2134d6471eb9" target="_blank">here</a>.</p><div><br /></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiw_MM3lJZmqF0Iow9MzjUVeBfHJuMN0K2pwtG__jTakro6gctDljQLOpmBooIM0CfLJLfqi0wSIKOjguuZWp_Ukr4I2lSPjxy_m-tm-0tyUCcw9RrStSYVj7jhozbbFhDTTmFPoWhxquts4nc-wq0FIFhjPWHtEoZ3Pi26hlaEItxR0_7wo5-Dwtu-/s602/black-swan-film-movie-natalie-portman-best-movies-ever.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="330" data-original-width="602" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiw_MM3lJZmqF0Iow9MzjUVeBfHJuMN0K2pwtG__jTakro6gctDljQLOpmBooIM0CfLJLfqi0wSIKOjguuZWp_Ukr4I2lSPjxy_m-tm-0tyUCcw9RrStSYVj7jhozbbFhDTTmFPoWhxquts4nc-wq0FIFhjPWHtEoZ3Pi26hlaEItxR0_7wo5-Dwtu-/s16000/black-swan-film-movie-natalie-portman-best-movies-ever.jpeg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></div><p></p>Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-22358080242171814382020-07-08T04:16:00.007-07:002020-07-10T05:31:20.404-07:00Água mami: relato de um parto (em tempos de pandemia)<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: cambria; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span lang=""> O primeiro sinal surgiu a caminhar pelo jardim, numa tarde de inícios de maio. Um dia como tantos outros, aparentemente desirmanado do calendário, estranhamente calmo, pandémico. Nesse tempo, todo o seu corpo se habituara a escutar-se a si próprio, em busca de provas, e agora elas despontavam, inexplicavelmente, fora do corpo. Bastou que uma folha de palmeira se mexesse alguns milímetros para que tudo mudasse. O silêncio em torno da casa ganhou outra textura, como se se tivesse aberto e dentro dele se revelasse um lago, e as águas desse lago tremessem a cada passo que dava, em torno ao jardim, até formarem uma ligeiríssima onda. Vivia-se a tarde do dia 3 de maio. Era dia da mãe, e também o primeiro dia a seguir ao fim do estado de emergência. Seria também este o momento em que deixava de estar grávida?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">Guardou para si o pequeno conhecimento da folha de palmeira e observou-o de todos o lados, enquanto alargava o passeio confinado. Sempre que alcançava a folha, aquela que ultrapassa o muro do jardim e alcança o cimento fendido por ervas daninhas, surgia o lago, com a sua levíssima onda a viajar até à orla. E a onda impelia-a a continuar. Só mais uma volta. A cada passo, inquiria o saber alcançado, que era mais que um saber, era uma espécie de poder. Às voltas em redor da casa, imaginava que essa casa era um enorme guarda sol, e o braço da palmeira o braço do guarda-sol, e o jardim uma grande praia. Fora assim que aprendera a andar, às voltas agarrada a um guarda-sol, numa praia do norte, diziam-lhe os pais. E isso agora fazia sentido. Os últimos meses afiguraram-se-lhe como um longo passeio circular em redor de alguma coisa, a cabeça a tocar na cauda, os regressos a cheirarem a cauda das partidas, o interior a recomeçar-se no exterior, e os meses a espraiarem-se por toda uma vida, ao longo da qual deixara de saber onde começava e onde terminava. Era isso estar grávida.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">Pensou: a onda vai imobilizar-se se eu parar de caminhar. E assim aconteceu. Ao entrar em casa, foi como se nada tivesse acontecido. Não contou a ninguém. Mas o lago lá estava, expectante, como um espelho de água num dia sem vento. Depois do jantar, a filha virou-se para ela e disse: água mami. Ela anuiu e subiram as escadas juntas, de mão dada, um dois três quatro cinco seis sete oito nove dez onze doze treze catorze quinze desaaaa-seis rumo à banheira, que encheram por metade. A barriga ocupava muito espaço e a filha parecia hipnotizada com a visão daquele monte, tocando o umbigo que lhe parecia um nariz. Na banheira, as ondas multiplicaram-se, recomeçando com novo ímpeto e espraiando-se pelo dia seguinte.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">A viagem para o hospital deu-se à meia noite e meia do dia 5, quando as ondas se tornaram constantes. O marido queria ir mais cedo, mas ela preferiu ouvir-se a si própria. À chegada, depararam-se com a incredulidade mal escondida do enfermeiro, que não estavam à espera de um parto não induzido. Qual o motivo da sua visita? e a pergunta deixou-a atónita. Demorou uns segundos para lhe responder, decidindo para isso não usar a palavra onda, para não espantar ainda mais o homem. Mas não marcou com a sua médica uma data para o parto? Não, não marcara. Esperara. Após lhe medir a temperatura, pediu-lhe que se sentasse na cadeira dos CTGs, onde permaneceu, obediente, munida da máscara e do audio-livro no telemóvel, à espera que a máquina confirmasse o óbvio. Nos auriculares, uma voz narrava uma imagem de um tapete voador que abraçava, como uma mão fechada, todas as mulheres que a ele se entregassem. Já ganhou um bilhete de entrada, sorriu o enfermeiro, enquanto analisava o gráfico das contrações, como se lhe estivesse a dar uma grande notícia. Numa outra sala, a enfermeira esperava-a. Não se sentou, embora a cada onda sentisse necessidade de se apoiar em alguma coisa. Só que o medo do contágio impelia-a para longe das superfícies. Encostou o ombro à parede. Aproveitou o tempo entre duas ondas para esfregar as mãos com desinfetante. Antes de abrir as pernas para o ritual seguinte, o do toque, fez o que tinha decidido fazer sempre que alguém lhe quisesse tocar no corpo. Pediu que lhe explicasse a razão da necessidade. E a enfermeira explicou, e no seu entender fê-lo bem, não seria maldosa, viu isso, não sabe como mas viu-o, na voz escondida debaixo da máscara. Então ela abriu as pernas, e permitiu que a invadisse. Três centímetros. Os três centímetros ecoaram pela sala e dispersaram-se pelos corredores vazios. Só três centímetros. Reparou então que o hospital era uma ilha na noite, habitada apenas por dois enfermeiros e uma grávida. Uma ilha no meio da pandemia, rodeada de ondas. Escondida por detrás da máscara, que era demasiado grande para a sua cara, sentiu-se só.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">Vai querer uma epidural?, perguntou-lhe como quem oferece um café a alguém que se senta para almoçar. A enfermeira escreveu na folha que não. Ofereceu-lhe também uma cadeira de rodas, mas já tinha percebido que as ondas eram mais fortes quando se sentava, por isso declinou. Agarrada às paredes, percorreu por entre as ondas aqueles corredores vazios, assolados por uma energia pandémica silenciosa. Dentro do quarto, esperava-a as malas e o marido, já sem máscara, a quem não tinham tirado a temperatura, e a quem não iriam, afinal, fazer o teste pandémico. Teria que permanecer no quarto sem sair, até que tudo se resolvesse. Até os presos têm direito a meia hora por dia ao ar livre, queixou-se no seu português quebrado. Mas todos fingiram não ouvir. Após lavar as mãos novamente, continuou com o audio-livro, já deitada. Testaram-na à covid, enfiando-lhe um longo tubo pelo nariz. Tinha visto na televisão muita gente a fazer testes e todos apareciam sentados, de mãos nas pernas e cabeça inclinada para trás, oferecendo o nariz aos enfermeiros numa imagem que poderia ser de docilidade e paz, mas que, afinal, como num quadro da Paula Rego, era de medo, poder e submissão perante os extenuantes plásticos dos enfermeiros. Porém, ninguém vinha depois dizer que doía. Agora descobria que era uma experiência dolorosa que a distraiu das ondas por uns instantes. Colocaram-lhe um cateter na mão. Voltaram a cingir-lhe os movimentos com outro CTG, informando-a que, se quisesse ir à casa de banho, teria de chamar alguém para a desamarrar. E novamente: vai querer uma epidural? Depois desapareceram pela ilha adentro antes que ela pudesse perguntar-lhes onde estava o botão de chamada.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">A barriga estava demasiado apertada. Queria mexer-se, caminhar, reclamar, e tê-lo-ia feito se esta fosse a primeira vez, mas resolveu aguentar o incómodo. Era importante não desperdiçar nenhuma força, sabia o que aí vinha, um ciclo de ondas que se intensificaria pela noite dentro até à exaustão, e era importante não desperdiçar energias. Concentrou-se na respiração e tentou descontrair-se com a ajuda das imagens do audio livro. Os exercícios de respiração acalmaram-na e foi aceitando cada onda, deixando que ela surgisse, abrisse, e se espraiasse. O marido deitara-se entretanto no sofá-cama, mas notava-se pela respiração que estava alerta a cada som.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">Às 05h30 as imagens que ouvia deixaram de a ajudar. Repara que não se mexera da cama desde que ali chegara, e que, não sabe exatamente quando, deixara de apreciar o fluir das ondas, passando a suportá-las, cada vez com mais dificuldade. Resolve pedir ajuda. As enfermeiras surgem dos corredores pandémicos e dizem-lhe que vão fazer o toque. 5 centímetros, ainda a tempo de uma epidural, se ela quiser. No meio das ondas constantes, ela pede que lhe expliquem o procedimento e recebe então uma explicação detalhada, Vai sentir-se no céu, mas antes disso tem que vir uma médica fazer um novo toque e avaliar a situação. Ela nega-se a um terceiro toque, em seu entender inútil, e perante a insistência das enfermeiras, começa a ficar nervosa. O bebé dá sinais de desconforto, que se traduzem num alarme vibrante do CTG. O marido acorda. Ponha-se de quatro em cima da cama. Foi o que bastou para o bebé acalmar e as dores melhorarem. Por que razão a obrigavam a estar amarrada a uma cama toda a noite? Lembrou-se das voltas que tinha dado em redor da casa, e perguntou-se como seria se o parto estivesse a acontecer no seu próprio quarto, na sua banheira, junto aos seus. Talvez nessa situação não precisasse de anestesias. Quando chegou a médica, voltou a dizer-lhe através da máscara que não queria mais um toque. Tinha um receio real que lhe rompessem as águas artificialmente durante essa operação táctil. As enfermeiras, vestidas de igual e com a mesma expressão, reuniram-se então com a médica, uma mulher mais baixa, a um canto do quarto para decidirem que estavam perante uma ‘naturalista’. Após esta pequena conferência, anunciaram que está bem, não é preciso novo toque, como se fossem elas a decidir e não ela, vamos chamar a anestesista para a epidural.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">Tens a certeza? O marido tinha assistido a tudo em silêncio. Nos meses anteriores, tinham falado em evitar a epidural, mas não a todo o custo. A memória do parto anterior pairava entre eles. No entanto, a pergunta fez despontar a cabeça do monstro da culpa. Como se estivesse a fracassar. A vontade de chorar, engoliu-a nesse momento. Apesar das dúvidas, escolheu dizer que tinha a certeza, deixa-te guiar por mim. Na verdade, só quando lhe espetaram a agulha nas costas e sentiu uma dor fina e fria a percorrer-lhe o corredor da espinha é que soube. A escolha era certa, não tinha fracassado.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">Com efeito, começou logo a sentir-se no céu, e todo o seu corpo serenou, juntamente com o do marido, como se a agulha se tivesse alongado das costas dela até às dele. Podia agora esticar-se na cama e esperar que as ondas surgissem, uma e outra, e outra, e outra. Já não estava na orla da praia mas desse novo lugar podia observar as ondas ao longe, a alisarem a areia, subindo pela praia e anunciando a maré cheia. Reparou, pela primeira vez, no som dos batimentos cardíacos do bebé, que a máquina do CTG lhe trazia constantemente, como uma promessa. Fechou os olhos e respirou fundo. O bebé estava mais perto e vinha a cavalo, num trote constante. Cada vez mais perto do local de encontro. De olhos fechados, ela abandonou o audio-livro e deixou que o som do bebé a cavalo a guiasse até esse local por ele combinado. Tudo o que tinha de fazer era deixar-se guiar. A passagem era cada vez maior. 6 centímetros, 7 centímetros, 8 centímetros.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">Aos 9 centímetros, as ondas alcançaram-na novamente e percebeu desta vez que eram mornas. Tinham-se rompido as águas, as mesmas que envolviam o bebé e que agora a envolviam a ela, revertendo a lógica da barriga. Era ela que nascia? Era ele quem a esperava? Tudo se intensificou. Olhou para o marido, que teria de permanecer no quarto durante a última fase do parto, e emocionou-se. Vai correr tudo bem, disseram um ao outro, a imitar o slogan dos pósteres com arco-íris a começar e a terminar em nuvens colados nas janelas por esse país fora, mas não deu para ver se estavam a sorrir.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">As luzes do teto passam-lhe agora por cima da máscara até à sala de parto, onde lhe pedem que rebole para outra cama. Seguram-lhe as pernas ao alto e encaixam-nas nos apoios, mas um deles, o da esquerda é desconfortável. Ela quer mexer-se mas está, uma vez mais, imobilizada, para que a médica possa estar confortavelmente sentada num banco entre as suas pernas. Nessa sala começa a fazer força, era tudo o que o corpo lhe pedia que fizesse. Faz força até o pescoço ficar vermelho, mas logo lhe dizem que está a fazer mal, tem que ser mais abaixo, a partir da barriga. O mesmo erro da última vez que pariu, e logo imagens difíceis lhe sobem ao cérebro, as mesmas que nos últimos meses procurara manter debaixo do tapete da memória. Concentra-se e volta a tentar. A intensidade é inacreditável. Sente o bebé a descer devagar dentro de si e essa sensação é nova, apesar de ser uma segunda gravidez sente o que nunca sentiu e volta a fazer força, agora sem sequer pensar na técnica do que está a fazer. O corpo entra em auto piloto, desaparece tudo, a médica, o corredor com as luzes pálidas, o marido preso no quarto, a cama que a apoia, a máscara que a esconde, as pernas levantadas, o cateter, até ficar só a voz dela e o bebé, ela grita como se a sua vida dependesse disso, o bebé avança, o corpo abre um pouco mais e torna-se verdadeiramente uma passagem, não só para o bebé mas para ela também, ela uma vez mais criadora de algo verdadeiramente novo, daqui a pouco vai sentir-se no céu está quase estou a tocar-lhe na cabeça mais uma vez força mais uma vez gritos, mas compassados com silêncios, não tem nada a ver com o que se vê nos filmes, o bebé desce devagar como se sentisse já uma certa nostalgia e quisesse despedir-se por fim daquela cápsula morna que nunca mais vai poder tocar cheirar sentir ela gostava que lhe dissessem que está a ir bem e que está quase por favor digam-me que está quase vou dar-lhe uma ajudinha rasga-se a pele aqui mais força mais força e o bebé já não desce mas desliza e transferem-no para os meus braços.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;"> É um rapaz quem chora agora. A máscara volta a surgir e absorve as minhas lágrimas, sempre serve para alguma coisa, estou convencida de que fui eu quem nasci guiada por ti, para poder encontrar esta voz que agora aqui relata coisas do outro mundo, o mundo que deixei para trás como uma pele de cobra no momento em que disse</span></div>
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<span lang="">Benjamim. O que tens para me ensinar?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="">Já no quarto, a enfermeira informa-me que não estou contaminada, e que por isso ninguém me vai tirar o bebé por duas semanas. Respiramos de alívio, e abraço-te com mais força. Lá fora, o dia nasce no mundo velho, por entre curvas achatadas, máscaras descartadas no lixo errado, mortes, festas ilegais, protestos anti-racistas e estátuas tombadas no chão, tudo como acontece nos filmes. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-45187496472359569872019-03-20T05:58:00.002-07:002019-03-20T06:17:22.289-07:00Baby, interrupted.<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Dear reader,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">How I have neglected you (yet again)! Happy Spring and greetings from the depths of maternity leave. When I
started writing this post, I was halfway through ML, which meant I was
a few days from getting my last full pay check until I got back to work in six
months’ time. I felt it was time to sit down and write my thoughts on what was
going on, while Joaninha
enjoyed her morning nap next door. On my right, the phone was telling me that
Bolsonaro had won the elections. I remember experiencing a wave of despair
running through me, followed by Joaninha’s inevitable wake up cry. And so I got up before I
even started. Needless to say, the blog post did not see
the light of day that month.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Then I blinked and she was 9 months old,
her first tooth cutting through her gums (and sometimes my breast), my sleep
deprivation reaching new heights because of something called separation anxiety and the unexpected fevers that came with the bexsero vaccine. My beloved Mozambique submerged by a cyclone. Brexit still going bonkers. Somehow, during
this time at home, I had managed to write a few lines for the blog, these very
few lines you are reading, whilst keeping my baby alive and taking care of the
house. I'm still not sure how that happened. In other words, I was starting to understand this
new way of living and writing – constantly interrupted by cries, poos and wees,
each interruption bringing me back to her body in need of mine. I soon realised
that, if I wanted to carry on writing, if only a few sentences here and there, I had to change my relationship
with technology. Forget about the laptop. My new best friend was now
the note app, which I could reach quickly every time I needed to write
something down, often with Joaninha hanging from my boob.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">A sentence I noted there one night, sitting
down in the bathroom (pretending I was peeing): “This maternity leave has
plunged me into my body.” My note app is packed with these silly sentences. I
call them silly when I compare them to the urgency of my daughter’s cry, which
does not need words to make sense. A wordless dictionary in my body decodes the
cry and urges me to run to her and I never write notes about the complexity of
that urge. I feel simultaneously sorry and happy that my sleep deprived mind is
unable to write about it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">It is not unusual that I keep on writing while Joaninha is crying. I should be running to her and yet I steal seconds,
sometimes minutes, to write stuff like this on my phone. I write only when I
refrain from going straight away. Which is another way of saying that I now write only when I feel guilty. By interrupting my presence in front of her,
I remind myself that I am me and she is not me. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">I need reminding. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment--><br />Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-8478633097815675102018-01-10T12:59:00.002-08:002018-01-10T13:11:02.319-08:00Notes on the French Letter<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC1b9TpQVyyMgNbcZoJVPa3Px1yOoac9RTMVfGFZdwc_Jw3awd3x0rSVyvCiqySoksaOkUcNCpNVmNgKW8AfX0p5bqFSwizBB7udxnei96YY5wT2rVBfDWOBFggFTNhf75voyEeRl_eT0/s1600/rabbit+hole.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="334" data-original-width="600" height="178" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC1b9TpQVyyMgNbcZoJVPa3Px1yOoac9RTMVfGFZdwc_Jw3awd3x0rSVyvCiqySoksaOkUcNCpNVmNgKW8AfX0p5bqFSwizBB7udxnei96YY5wT2rVBfDWOBFggFTNhf75voyEeRl_eT0/s320/rabbit+hole.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Reader! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">By now you know me well enough to understand that
I could not resist the temptation to write about the appearance of an
all-female authored French Letter. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">I know I should be marking. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">I know I should be preparing my lectures. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN-GB">But it's impossible.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Instead, here I am, looking at the French Letter
like a rabbit caught in the headlights. I feel guilty that I’m engaging in the
wrong kind of writing but I'm trying not to care (much). That’s my motto for 2018.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Maybe it’s because I’ve been watching too
many French series on Netflix. Or maybe my high-school French teachers actually
did a fine job. The truth is I was able to find my way through “<a href="http://soirmag.lesoir.be/133122/article/2018-01-09/catherine-deneuve-et-99-autres-femmes-sengagent-contre-le-puritanisme" target="_blank">Les Femmes libèrent une autre parole</a>” and understand most of it.</div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">The whole text is premised on one assumption:
the #metoo movement coerces women to speak out in the name of puritanism, as
the eternal victims, </span>“<i>pauvres petites choses sous l’emprise de phallocrates demons, comme aux bon vieux temps de la sorcellerie</i>”.<span lang="EN-GB"> According to the authors,
the freedom to speak out has become its opposite. In other words, #metoo has
gone too far: </span><i>“La vague purificatoire ne semble connaître aucune limite.</i>” It<span lang="EN-GB"> has crossed to the other side, and now the victims become those
men who have been constrained to quit their jobs without being able to defend
themselves:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i>En face, les hommes sont sommés de battre leur coulpe et de dénicher, au fin fond de leur conscience rétrospective, un « comportement déplacé » qu’ils auraient pu avoir voici dix, vingt, ou trente ans, et dont ils devraient se repentir. La confession publique, l’incursion de procureurs autoproclamés dans la sphère privée, voilà qui installe comme un climat de société totalitaire.</i></blockquote>
<div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">This situation, it is argued, has led to
the entrenchment of a symbolic struggle that opposes women to men, a struggle
that educated French women, in their sensuous, luscious and stylish way, have learned
to overcome. As a French journalist speaking on the BBC radio 4 this morning
(10 January 2018) explained to a gobsmacked British counterpart, and I paraphrase, she signed the
letter because women in France are not monolithic like women in the UK and in
America. Women in these other countries are black and white, which makes them very good at building computers, while women in
France are more colourful and complex. They are not afraid of men and are able to
stand up for themselves if they are the victims of an attack, without the need
to rely on pre-established laws.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Never mind the clear white female
upper-middle class viewpoint that is being expressed above. What really struck
a chord was the manner in which the French Letter attempted to fit the whole #metoo
movement in a “both sides of the Atlantic” argument (Miguel Vale de Almeida also finds it difficult to escape the expression in his <a href="http://miguelvaledealmeida.net/2018/01/cronica-57/" target="_blank">blog post</a>, although he prefers to write "both sides of the puddle"), as if the women who have
been getting involved were simply British/American and French. While this is mostly true, it is not entirely true, as women in Russia, Egypt and China, to mention but a few other countries, have joined their voices to the outcry. The use of the
word “<i>puritanisme</i>”, which appears in the second paragraph of the letter, and
then again in the third paragraph (“<i>purificatoire</i>”), re-centres the #metoo
movement on old Anglo-French disputes, and in doing so, reinstates feminist
international hierarchies as it discusses the legitimacy of who can speak in
the name of (which) women. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Allow me to unpack just a little. Women’s
sexual empowerment has always depended on the circulation of ideas, and this is
one good reason why national boundaries should never be discarded when
discussing feminisms. Whoever has done research on this subject knows well that
there are centres within centres, and margins within margins. In the case of
the French Letter, this knowledge is literally swept under the carpet. Here, the stories
that make up the #metoo movement are used – they are discarded, or meshed into
a simplified group – in order to confirm, once more, the boundaries of the
white French and Anglo-American viewpoints. </span>In that sense, this French Letter is useful insofar as it allows a reflection to occur about important questions relating to femininity and feminism that have been hanging around since at least the early years of the Women’s Movement in the late 1960s and early 1970s. How can we subvert relations of domination in the world through the use of words? Who can legitimately speak up in the name of women? </div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">What I think the #metoo
movement has achieved is this: a greater understanding of the importance of being taken
seriously as a public speaker. However, this is unfortunately read as going too far by the authors of the French Letter. </span><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-size: 12pt;">According to them, one way in
which #metoo has gone too far is that it has allowed for the work of men to be
confused with the men themselves: </span><i>“dans la confusion absurde de l’homme et de l’œuvre, on demande l’interdiction de la rétrospective Roman Polanski à la Cinémathèque, (…) [et on juge] le film Blow Up de Michelangelo Antonioni « misogyne » et « inacceptable.” </i></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;">In this context, it is interesting to note how </span><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-size: 12pt;">the legitimacy of the writers of the letter has been sealed – in
both the French and UK media and, I suspect, around the world too - by the
signature of Catherine Deneuve as the icon of French sexual open-mindedness. A
similar confusion between the <i>femme</i>
and the <i>oeuvre</i>, which undergirds Anglo-French
disseminations of the contents of the letter, namely with reference to
Deneuve’s participation in <i>Belle de Jour</i>,
is at the heart of the dissemination of the letter, </span>and this does not seem to be upsetting anyone<span style="font-size: 12pt;">:</span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i>“The Oscar-nominated Deneuve, 74, is best known internationally for playing a bored housewife who spends her afternoons as a prostitute in Luis Buñuel’s classic 1967 film Belle de Jour.”</i> (<a href="https://www.theguardian.com/film/2018/jan/09/catherine-deneuve-men-should-be-free-hit-on-women-harvey-weinstein-scandal" target="_blank">The Guardian</a>)</blockquote>
By lending her symbolic capital to the French Letter’s purposes, Deneuve is not only providing the prestige that will guarantee great media coverage. She is also showing, perhaps inadvertently, that the question of who is a legitimate speaker, whether in film or in real life (or in both) is part and parcel of what engenders schemes of perception out there, in the world. Deneuve knows this as well as Buñuel, Antonioni or Polanski.<br />
<br />
The #metoo movement is not about the shaming of men or the victimisation of women, but about their, both men and women’s, empowerment through the spoken word. Before #metoo, women (and some men) could speak and scream about harassment but most would not be taken seriously. With #metoo, they are being taken seriously as legitimate speakers. They are being heard. For most women out there, and I’m talking about women whose identity is partially defined not only by the geographical margins that they inhabit but also in relation to the dominant (Anglo-French) feminist discourses that circulate around the world, for those women, speaking out is not a way of enforcing female victimisation. In a culture that cherishes silence about sexual harassment, opening your mouth and speaking out is the ultimate act of empowerment.<style>
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Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-68310845710300659872017-12-10T13:06:00.000-08:002017-12-10T13:12:25.659-08:00The grant and the strawberry: a bundle of joy and strain (and so much joy!)<div class="MsoNormal">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5vVk1H0gS0SrxwuN7pSYC7f9Ds2zMSmFoVr5x-q12XxVMVn_8VivR4odjDA3YQBygWVnrMBGTSUlmZpeEU80W8L49tz95gfrvi_za2Pu91FYk4WYNR1qEtZxzDTuB22M-gYtfPvc1QjQ/s1600/chocolate-covered-strawberry-cupcakes-5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5vVk1H0gS0SrxwuN7pSYC7f9Ds2zMSmFoVr5x-q12XxVMVn_8VivR4odjDA3YQBygWVnrMBGTSUlmZpeEU80W8L49tz95gfrvi_za2Pu91FYk4WYNR1qEtZxzDTuB22M-gYtfPvc1QjQ/s320/chocolate-covered-strawberry-cupcakes-5.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">Hello
reader,</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11.0pt;">It
was week zero when news of the grant came. I was sitting at my desk in the
office, alone, writing emails and shifting rapidly inside my head between the
term’s teaching, research and admin. When the email dropped I literally started
shaking. Once I opened it and read the news I was ecstatic. I had just landed
a 2 year AHRC Early Career Leadership Fellows grant for research on memory and mobility in the
Brown Atlantic. The title: “Women of the Brown Atlantic: Real and Imaginary
Passages in Portuguese 1711-2011.” Three years of work and preparation had
finally paid off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11.0pt;">But
as I descended from the clouds of jubilation, I couldn’t even share the news on
social media. I felt excited but also humbled, and mostly fearful of the task
ahead of me. Going through the application documents I marvelled at the
meaning(lessness) of what I had achieved. As I read the title of my grant, I did
not particularly believe that I was a leader in the making. I felt leader-ish
at best. How on earth was I going to deliver all this in two years? When were
my partners and mentors going to find out that this is, indeed, an insane
project and I’m not fit for the job? Yes, for the next two years, I didn’t have
to worry about getting any funding for my research, and maybe this would even
translate into more good news about a possible early promotion, which was very
cool. For the next two years, I could
take a deep breadth: everything would be alright. For two years. And then the
chase would be on again, and the pressure to apply for new grants would come
back with a vengeance.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11.0pt;">I
felt nauseous.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11.0pt;">In fact, something
was happening to me. To my body, that is. I can only describe it as a sort of
mutation glimpsed daily through the corner of my eye. I was experiencing a lot
of tiredness, </span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.6667px;">like I had been hit by a horse tranquilizer</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">. Term hadn’t even started and my body was already feeling like it
was week 10. I initially attributed it to my mind’s inability to rise up to the
Leadership Fellows challenge. But no, reader. This was something else entirely.
Things were about to get even more, uh, interesting. Turns out I was not only a
grant holder, I was a pregnant grant holder! Now I had to be both a productive
and reproductive leader, all at the same time.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11.0pt;">No
pressure.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDmYWTR0DaFtwK_Yta_wjMJFvsx8SaPCBTfQvMPbsQGoSYBytm93Fln5GqlWvtUJK_DJYDqkF7I6g_TovX6DyvAEjiq0pHEeKQtz-Y_WS0IHuLi1sa70Qf25VOYabLhH7XbnHBqm33skM/s1600/Strawberry-Prosecco-Cupcakes_Summary.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="840" data-original-width="840" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDmYWTR0DaFtwK_Yta_wjMJFvsx8SaPCBTfQvMPbsQGoSYBytm93Fln5GqlWvtUJK_DJYDqkF7I6g_TovX6DyvAEjiq0pHEeKQtz-Y_WS0IHuLi1sa70Qf25VOYabLhH7XbnHBqm33skM/s320/Strawberry-Prosecco-Cupcakes_Summary.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">It was an interesting discovery, learning that, whilst my mind was totally focused on the perils of getting what you want from the AHRC, my body indifferently hosted a little strawberry (every week they call it a different fruit or veg) with limbs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">The strawberry, soon to become a prune and then a lime in my belly, according to the wisdom of the latest apps, is the most accomplished example of the force that I believe drives us: what my mother would call miracles, what I prefer to call luck. A single sperm, out of three hundred million, somehow found a passage through me and survived, while MILLIONS died trying to cross over, and, choosing the right corridor containing the fertilized prize, surged against motions without getting trapped, attaching itself to the prize, and somehow – SOMEHOW! – my body didn’t reject the resulting bean. What are the odds of that happening? To a 38 year old? So, you see, the strawberry is already teaching me important life lessons. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">Take your prize, recognise how lucky you got, and get on with it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">How can I put it into words? The whole situation suddenly felt, let me tell you, liberating. More exactly, the passages between the grant and the strawberry were liberating. Through them, a passage to Portugal was crystallising. Short term, I know. But long term has its perils. It’s the bridge I was looking for. Non-permanent, but real. A route transporting me elsewhere, inside my body and in my imagination, and outside it, through the ocean, through the skin, away from Brexit for a white. Expanding, like the universe.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">But what if?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">What if I end up only half-doing everything, once the little strawberry arrives? Until now, I thought my dedication to what I do was undying. Now the little one inside me, comfortably tucked away in the darkest regions of my belly, will soon be a totally helpless human being, demanding constant attention, and a lot more. I hold a permanent lectureship, so I am entitled to paid maternal leave, and most importantly, I don’t (think I) have to worry about losing my job. I have all the support in the world from my family and colleagues. But what about the rest? How will I be able to travel to conferences and archives with a little one? Have I got what it takes to be both a forward-moving Leadership Fellow and an academic and a mother? Will I have the energy? I could carry the child with me everywhere in the beginning. But how will my colleagues, project partners and students react to that? Will I be taken less seriously? The feminist inside cannot but conjure the image of an inevitably stalled career ahead.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">These and other questions come to me usually just before I fall asleep, which totally defeats the purpose of enjoying every hour of my current childless life. I can still spend more than three hours writing a lecture on <i>Virgem Margarida</i>, read more than a few pages of fiction before going to sleep for 8 hours (though now with lots of trips to the loo), and attend conferences in London without having to worry about child-care. Once the little one arrives, all of this will be gone.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">It’s an incredibly wonderful thing, being lucky. But I confess I feel a bit lost, despite all the wonder and excitement. Having strong academic role models who are also mothers is a great source of inspiration, but somehow it is not enough. Where are the babies and the children in academia? I see them only when I go to my colleagues’ family-friendly parties. At 9pm they vanish into thin air and become invisible to me, only to return surreptitiously in reading week, now much bigger, holding their parents’ hands, in student-less corridors. Where do they go, and why do they go, academic parents of the world? Where are the spaces for mothering and fathering in academia? Where are the crossings, the passageways?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">Everything will change, they say. As I dive into the Brown Atlantic in search of the real and imaginary passages of women, my child will inevitably dive in with me, as we look for answers – and passages – together.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt;">This is probably my first letter to you.</span></div>
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<br />Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-74544658481163003582017-11-13T08:55:00.001-08:002017-11-13T08:55:48.991-08:00O cão que passou sem ladrar. #eutambém #metoo<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjztMsLbJW8fDPkkmFmFUhzcK2tHvHqI-uALurh37rax2Uuc6w-KwSr0ma-yYOv_aQT57pCsI_tu5Ob3QwNUuchQXNCIIFsuNQBlavUWs65voz1m5nXbUgIqMQtt5QWv7EJ_-eh0UZorpQ/s1600/metoo-man-repeller-oct-2017-3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1300" height="221" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjztMsLbJW8fDPkkmFmFUhzcK2tHvHqI-uALurh37rax2Uuc6w-KwSr0ma-yYOv_aQT57pCsI_tu5Ob3QwNUuchQXNCIIFsuNQBlavUWs65voz1m5nXbUgIqMQtt5QWv7EJ_-eh0UZorpQ/s320/metoo-man-repeller-oct-2017-3.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Não vou falar aqui
de todos os cães que ladraram ao passarem por mim: os piropos de todos os
tipos, as perguntas retóricas porcas, os apalpões na discoteca e fora dela, as
assobiadelas na rua e dentro dos portões da escola, as mãos desenvoltas a tocarem
mais do que devem, os comportamentos e tiradas absurdas<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>justificados pelo vinho em jantares de colégio britânico <i>crème de la
crème</i>. Vou, pelo contrário, dedicar-me a contar o episódio de um cão que passou
por mim sem ladrar, e desde já peço perdão aos animais a quem chamamos cães,
cuja decência não está em causa. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Acho que era uma noite de
primavera. Os dias cresciam e a calmia do lusco-fusco acontecia entre as 7h30 e as 8 da
noite. Devia ter um doze ou treze anos. Saía das aulas de inglês, no cimo da vila, com um grupo de amigas.
Sentíamo-nos grandes. Gostávamos de ir a pé para casa todas juntas, sem pais à
espera em carros. Nessa noite, uma das amigas sugeriu que passássemos por uma rua diferente, para tentarmos criar um encontro “casual” com o rapaz mais
velho por quem se apaixonara na escola. Talvez ele estivesse à janela, talvez
estivesse a entrar em casa, venham lá, não demora nada, pá, vai ser divertido. Essa rua não tinha grande iluminação, ficava fora do caminho. Não gostei da ideia.
Olha agora, ir atrás do rapaz, nem sequer sabes se ele está em casa, ou se gosta
de ti, deixa-te de coisas, ainda o espantas. E decidi esperar por elas ali mesmo, no cruzamento
da estrada que dá para a Câmara Municipal. Elas foram, entre risadas, e eu
esperei, debaixo do poste da luz. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Passados uns
minutos, aproxima-se um carro e pára a uns metros de mim. O condutor olha-me e
sorri. Abre a porta do passageiro e chama-me. A minha primeira reação foi pensar que se tratava de alguém conhecido, esta
vila é tão pequena, quem me diz a mim que não é um tio ou amigo dos meus pais a
oferecer-me boleia. Aproximo-me com meio sorriso. Lembro-me do cabelo loiro
penteado para trás e da pele baça. Lembro-me do sorriso nojento e das palavras, Entra, senta-te. Uma mão no volante, outra no assento do passageiro, a convidar-me. De
repente, algo dentro de mim me diz: foge. E fechando a porta do carro, desatei
a correr. Rua do Vale abaixo, passando pela ponte, até alcançar a Rua 25 de Abril.
Parei apenas dentro do prédio, fechando a porta atrás de mim, sem fôlego. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">É aí, no vão da escada, que procuro restabelecer-me, controlar a respiração antes de entrar em casa. Ao
abrirem a porta, os meus pais perguntam-me, Chegaste cedo, está tudo bem?, e
eu, Sim, tudo bem. E as tuas amigas? Já foram para casa, mandam beijinhos. Vou
para o meu quarto, e encerro dentro de mim um encontro que poderia ter mudado o
rumo da minha vida e do meu corpo. Se o carro me tivesse perseguido, se o homem tivesse saído do carro, se....<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">Voltei a encontrar
ocasionalmente esse homem pelas ruas da Sertã, e sempre que o via enchia-me de
vergonha. Nunca percebi por que razão morria de vergonha sempre que ele
passava. Uma vez, no carro com a minha mãe, ao saírmos da garagem, tivemos de
dar passagem ao carro dele. Passou-nos pela frente como uma cena de filme em
câmara lenta. Ele a olhar-nos com aquele sorriso nojento, o assento ao lado vago, para sempre a convidar, Entra, senta-te. E lembro-me de a
minha mãe ter comentado o quanto aquele homem a incomodava. Fiz de conta que
não ouvi, e tentei esconder a vermelhidão do rosto. Tenho a sensação de que a
minha mãe também o odiava e temia, mas nunca falámos sobre isso. Havia a vergonha a
preencher o espaço entre mim e a minha mãe. Aliás, nunca contei esta história a
ninguém.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Pergunto-me quais
terão sido as consequências deste meu silêncio, motivado pela vergonha. Sem ter
cometido nada de errado, este episódio de tentativa de sedução de um homem mais
velho contribuiu para incentivar em mim uma submissão silenciosa e cheia de vergonha
no que diz respeito aos avanços agressivos dos cães que ladram, mas
principalmente aos avanços dos que não ladram. Como se de certa forma eu, o meu corpo, fossemos culpados do
que tantas vezes acontece quase sem acontecer. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Eu escapei. Mas quantas crianças terão passado por aquele assento?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-11721631142427658382017-08-15T10:28:00.000-07:002017-09-22T10:43:51.617-07:00A feminist gets married<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9I7eJqR8lLmxwtgs2WRQgIYMT24v8bYjqmItOBKAslTg0zCTSrD9KQcUolUppMuLp7B5dtd_GM5a4H0DyS9MLoJKb5hM_zYivnZ-8fnGn3Kb1Xcyns2bvILyQP8FJSXFBg5zX_FexlMc/s1600/noivos.6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1068" data-original-width="1600" height="425" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9I7eJqR8lLmxwtgs2WRQgIYMT24v8bYjqmItOBKAslTg0zCTSrD9KQcUolUppMuLp7B5dtd_GM5a4H0DyS9MLoJKb5hM_zYivnZ-8fnGn3Kb1Xcyns2bvILyQP8FJSXFBg5zX_FexlMc/s640/noivos.6.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;">(Sertã, 5th August 2017)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 12pt;">The day came when he
proposed and I accepted, which led to a feminist getting married.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">I was busy proposing something myself, that is, writing a grant proposal. We had
come back from a bike ride, and I had gone back to the office to carry on with my study leave duties. Sitting down at my desk, which faces a window that opens to the knowledge of
trees and green bushes, I didn’t understand, at first, why he’d put a ring on
top of the book that was open to my left.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I almost asked him not to disturb me because I was having an idea and
trying to put it into words. Then the penny dropped. I looked at him, then at
the ring, then at him again. I smiled, and said “what?” a few times, and
finally exclaimed “Yes, let’s get married!” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">I confess there was some hesitation in my
answer, as much as there was in his. But I saw this ring as the
starting point of a journey into life as a team, and although I was and still
am very much afraid of this journey, of what it may bring to someone who calls
herself a feminist, I took it wholeheartedly, in my own utopian way. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">In the six months that took us to organize
the wedding, family interests and social expectations calibrated much of what
we wanted to do. I had never thought much about weddings, but I knew well
enough what I didn’t want to happen. I persisted as a feminist killjoy for as
long as I possibly could, and I had my victories, some of which were big, many
small. Can you name a feminist who doesn’t believe in the power of small
victories? The person who married us was a cheerful woman who mentioned
equality several times throughout the ceremony. The person who translated the ceremony into English was a renowned feminist male colleague and dear friend. After months of endless fighting, I ended
up taking my husband's last name, but without renouncing any of my last names.
I named our table after my favourite women writers. I bought a second-hand,
inexpensive dress. I gave a speech alongside my husband. I prepared a video
documentary that honoured my grandmothers and their <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">bolos de boda</i> tradition. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">It was an effort from all sides, to fight for
our joy and ideals on our day. But to pick our fights: that is, I think, the
greatest lesson. To understand what tools we have to struggle, becoming aware
of what we can do, how far we can go. How much we can let go. In the run-up to
my wedding, everything I believe in became hyper-real, alive and urgent, and
more personal than ever. </span>I was happy, sad, shimmering, frustrated, loved, in love, touched, enraged, vulnerable and strong. Feminist identity was a
site of struggle and negotiation like never before. Placing feminism on the
grounds of my wedding venue, which was also my parent’s garden, felt like opening my body to the world for the first time. In an
episode that my seven girlfriends from Sertã will love to find out, I
inexplicably lost my bra as I was getting ready to jump into the wedding dress,
which led to the ceremony being delayed by half an hour. But I did not forget
to leave a book by a favourite woman writer under the tree where we got
married. I married by silently disturbing the grounds that I had accepted, and
by trying to forget about other people’s judgements of what the good daughter,
the good bride and the good feminist look like. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">It was beautiful because it was
tough and earned, and because </span>our own mix and match of traditions and innovation was <span style="font-size: 12pt;">thought-through to the last detail and fully experienced. The greatest victory will be to be able to say in a few years’ time
that my wedding year shines through my relation with my husband as much as through my writing on feminism and women. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;">In the meantime, I'm still waiting to hear on that grant proposal. Fingers crossed! :) </span></div>
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-43588806649083243682017-02-07T14:51:00.001-08:002017-04-30T10:23:02.334-07:00How to become a study leave super hero (of sorts)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwea4kR3JXuslr9aC390sBoIB8o3X8ZuckOAUj5ijZOSCZxntydvbgezcPwG1i_r-h5kQP-6vfEzDZw4mnArY8xOIOWLttlkysPQSaJp_O-0fNy-cgriqnVwQlCff1wz2aUEWsQi_N6rs/s1600/batgirl_1439993004028_22920607_ver1.0_640_480.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="288" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwea4kR3JXuslr9aC390sBoIB8o3X8ZuckOAUj5ijZOSCZxntydvbgezcPwG1i_r-h5kQP-6vfEzDZw4mnArY8xOIOWLttlkysPQSaJp_O-0fNy-cgriqnVwQlCff1wz2aUEWsQi_N6rs/s400/batgirl_1439993004028_22920607_ver1.0_640_480.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">If you send me an email now you’ll find out
that I’ve been officially on study leave since the 9<sup>th</sup> of January.
Apart from formally applying for this a year ago by promising to accomplish
this world and the next, writing a permanent out of the office response on my
email was my main preparation for the six months ahead. Well, five now. Oh dear.
When your business is a small language, there’s no way around it. You end up
having to deal with post-term bits and bobs. December was dedicated to wrapping
up a crazy teaching load, attending a conference and then going home for
Christmas. January was swallowed up by family, a trip to South Africa, a research meeting in Portugal, and, well,
marking. No wonder it went so fast.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Also, I never thought I would be writing
this, but it hasn’t been easy to accept the idea that I’m not teaching. It
sounds ridiculous, I know. But it has actually been quite hard to just let go. I have been spotted smiling
sheepishly at my colleagues in the copy machine area. Several times. Please learn from me, future study leavers. Don't look back!</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">So, I’ve decided, for the sake of sanity,
that the REAL start is going to be February 9<sup>th</sup>. January will be
known from now on as my rather unproductive transition month. It’s allowed. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">February is perfect, you see. I’m
travelling to Birmingham on the 9th to take part in a conference, so I’ll be
away from both my home office and my university office. I’ll be on my favourite
public transport. I’ve written my best paragraphs on trains, cosily nestled near
a power socket by the window, in the quiet coach. And before jumping on the
train I’m going to buy a new notebook. Yes!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmOj6raDFJxX0_f3sQH82K1p9DzlEbsdOu7-kdZT_63zfPAh6pOTH9X65jr8BemFIHrFHtsJgY2n3GdhgSeLv2Vxf1Hs736mK5tq3z_wcW4eqVPoKEbws9jKhr2uYvNlT4LnkXOhImA_M/s1600/notebook.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmOj6raDFJxX0_f3sQH82K1p9DzlEbsdOu7-kdZT_63zfPAh6pOTH9X65jr8BemFIHrFHtsJgY2n3GdhgSeLv2Vxf1Hs736mK5tq3z_wcW4eqVPoKEbws9jKhr2uYvNlT4LnkXOhImA_M/s200/notebook.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Speaking of traveling, many people relocate
to another environment during their study leaves. Having closely considered
this possibility, I have decided I’m not going to do it. You see, my writing
likes routine and familiarity, so I’m mainly going to stay in my natural
habitat, where I will set out not to do what I don’t like about my normal day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">The first thing I’m not going to do in the
morning is to check my email. In fact, I’m going to add a note on my permanent
out-of-office message to inform the world that from now on I’m checking it only
on Fridays. There. Pow! I expect many good things to come out of this very simple
resolution, such as doing only what I want to do, which boils down to writing
as many hours as I can in the morning. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">The second thing I’m not going to do is to
postpone interesting readings. Say I come across a really interesting article
whilst browsing about something completely different? Well, hello article! I vow
to read a good academic article every other day. This serendipitous reading will happen in the
afternoons, after I’ve been for a run and had a shower. Pow wow!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Third, </span> I refuse to work after hours. Absolutely no work allowed after
17h00 and during weekends. So, hello brand new stand mixer, hello scrapbooking, hello
leisure reading, hello TV and silly season four of whatever, hello bike, hello fun!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB">Now, where did I put my cape?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-90215101551152316512016-12-15T05:39:00.000-08:002016-12-15T14:53:05.661-08:00Call me a "young old" scholar: notes on the AHRC ECR conference "Past Matters, Research Futures" (12-13 December 2016, Royal Society, London) <div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuVrffi-2_FFio6QoFhfygtd7N_zYm3X6n3BzduTZVVJZ9mNpzmqsFj9euyCNrQeMge2zSgYhrGtRlW44d2LDv75f437yk2BpoeU7Ku2oeuPwjxsJYpHnbk2gXDmke6CPDvRQeC3C1ApA/s1600/20161212_123954.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuVrffi-2_FFio6QoFhfygtd7N_zYm3X6n3BzduTZVVJZ9mNpzmqsFj9euyCNrQeMge2zSgYhrGtRlW44d2LDv75f437yk2BpoeU7Ku2oeuPwjxsJYpHnbk2gXDmke6CPDvRQeC3C1ApA/s320/20161212_123954.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">(conference booklet)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">I’m an early
career researcher who is about to become a “normal” researcher (whatever that
means) in exactly 10 months’ time. This makes me a “young old” scholar of sorts
(sigh). Over the past four months I started to feel uneasy about being a young
old scholar. It didn’t bother me much during the summer, when I still thought
of myself as kind of young young. But, after spending Term 1 trying to juggle a
heavy teaching load with the urgent, but ultimately impossible, task of
finishing my pending AHRC ECR grant application, it suddenly hit me that –
shock horror – I was getting young old, and that this was my last chance to
take advantage of the ring fenced money kept aside for UK-based ECRs’ researchers,
young and old alike. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">Tick. Tick. Tick.
I hear it distinctly when I’m in bed at night.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">So I was very glad
to find out that the organisers of the conference “Past Matters, Research
Futures” not only accepted the panel proposal on “Consuming Authenticities:
Time, Place and the Past in ‘Authentic’ foods and drinks” that my lovely group
of colleagues Deborah, Emma-Jayne, Anna and I put together, but also made a
point of dedicating a significant amount of conference time to this and other
matters that are so much in the minds and hearts of young young, young old, and
old young (explanation below) researchers. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLiAyC1nZhzR6HvR0OEulR_uFaiJ1SOAz1EvkOM93aSJ195ikfC4nXRpJAWM_wLjnMO5CLO12D5FWzvI9ioQVZrSkhhHw1SyQr5k7UnQ-NkW6IPily9OoF-3H0Lao9VrviR_jX6v-T_zY/s1600/group.discussion.ahrc.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLiAyC1nZhzR6HvR0OEulR_uFaiJ1SOAz1EvkOM93aSJ195ikfC4nXRpJAWM_wLjnMO5CLO12D5FWzvI9ioQVZrSkhhHw1SyQr5k7UnQ-NkW6IPily9OoF-3H0Lao9VrviR_jX6v-T_zY/s320/group.discussion.ahrc.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "arial";">(panel discussion on "Consuming Authenticities")</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">The event was a
joint endeavour between the AHRC and the Cluster of Excellence LABEX, and it brought
together UK and French scholars as well as non-academic partners to address
issues that are of common interest to both the Care for the Future theme and
the LABEX Pasts in Present: History, Heritage, Memory. The conference, organised
mainly by ECRs, focused not only on research issues but also on two aspects that
are often neglected in conference discussions: the particular challenges of
both early career research and partnership working. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">Yes, partnership
working. Tick. Tick. Tick.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">I confess I do not
(yet) master the art of fruitful, joyful, happily-ever-after partnerships with
non-academic people. I have been rejected a few times. I mean, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">my proposals</i> have been rejected a few
times. The first time it happened I wanted to close down my inbox and run away
to Dartmoor. The second time it happened, I decided to say thank you and move
on to the next institution on my list. The third time it happened I took a step
back and thought of proposing a counter offer. I am still thinking, and, hey,
who knows, maybe it will bear fruits, or not. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">(Keep reading my
blog to find out.) <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">Anyway, one thing
I wanted to write here is that attending this conference has given me the
courage and inspiration to really think harder about creative ways of nurturing
the contacts that I have been lucky enough to gather as a young young
researcher, as they may assist me in my young old short life. I listened in
complete awe to the presentation of Katharina Zinn, an Egyptologist from the
University of Wales Trinity Saint David, Lampeter, who told us – with a smile –about
the advantages of not having funding in the initial stages of your project. She
started a cooperative project with a local Museum, after discovering a number
of Egyptian artefacts hidden away in the basement of the Museum (one was a
headless statue, one was a wooden beard, another was the tiniest plate). Her
small huge discoveries led her to bring these objects back to life via
exhibitions, story-telling and even a “Museum of Lies”! Who wouldn’t be
inspired by this stuff?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKKJiLVZguxt5MmZzcPae5RVzm1hPqtmMim1jCUYUm1XlI2kRZn31oUHIvHZgoRm-yAMQV6AC6XXvmy4TKdnRiouM5sirvesSZauvNsWYskrLtTD5ZeEjPrcgBGjE8QMOrz9dskG5x37o/s1600/20161212_124354.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKKJiLVZguxt5MmZzcPae5RVzm1hPqtmMim1jCUYUm1XlI2kRZn31oUHIvHZgoRm-yAMQV6AC6XXvmy4TKdnRiouM5sirvesSZauvNsWYskrLtTD5ZeEjPrcgBGjE8QMOrz9dskG5x37o/s320/20161212_124354.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">(coffee break)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">I was also
intrigued by the presentation of a film artwork, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Ten Commandments</i>, which was commissioned by the AHRC-funded
project “Re-configuring Ruins: Materialities, Processes and Mediations,” in
conjunction with the Museum of London Archaeology and NewBridge Project
Newcastle. My notes of this panel read: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">“What turns a ruin
into a ruin? Guadalupe and the American flag. (Look, the Portuguese flag too!
Religious processions with the Portuguese flag in the streets of Guadalupe,
cool!) <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Ten Commandments</i>, ruins of
a movie, montage of images and sound. There are echoes and double images.
Splitting the screen into three breaks down the linearity of the story into
three viewpoints that sometimes overlap and unite. Generative remembrance:
during the process of recollection, remembering not what happened but something
else. (Not sure what this means.) <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Ruina</i>:
social downfall and ruination. Duality of the ruin. Social relationships in the
real world. Embodied action. Structured narrative, gaps and silences and black
screens in the movie. Absences. Creative destruction of capitalism. Curated
heritage ruins. Surface and depth. Surface: small town America, the sand dunes,
four-by-four sand driving, driving the sand like surfers; Depth: religion, the
immigrants. Memories, legacies meshed together in the everyday. Co-creation.
There was an open call for artists (commission process): the artist had to
create a piece on a given topic and would have freedom. There were no questionnaires
as they wanted to avoid using art: they wanted art to speak for itself and give
full freedom to the artists. (not convinced by the group’s premise that not
wanting to “use” art was something inherently positive.)” </span></blockquote>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">The conference
booklet detailed an ambitious and innovative list of potential outputs and
resources. The venue included a nice BREAK/OUT room, which provided delegates
with a quiet space for calling home, unwinding, or writing and filming
responses, ideas and resources for future gatherings. I also enjoyed the way in
which day one ended: with a “Question Time” – style panel discussion on current
priorities in research and the world of heritage. Some of the questions that
were thrown at the panellists were:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="line-height: 150%; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">How
can the study of heritage relate to or inform global challenges and sustainable
development goals?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="line-height: 150%; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">What
advice would you give to ECRs working within the heritage sector wanting to
maintain a research profile?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="line-height: 150%; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">What
do you suggest is done with heritage assets that we must let go of?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">The conference
ended with many what nexts. I agree with Prof Andrew Thompson, who stressed
that the role of early-career researchers is changing, that it is an ambiguous
place to inhabit, not only if you are young old like me, but also if you are
old young (if you had a previous life outside academia and are trying to balance
the two worlds in your life). And yes, the ivory tower image does not seem to apply
any longer, at least not to most people participating in this conference, and certainly
not to most ECRs out there. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">Except…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">Except, there’s
something about the ivory tower metaphor that I want to preserve as a small
personal intangible heritage for the future of my own. Something about blue
skies and utopian meanderings that come with and around the word “tower,” which
are far from impacts and statistics and goal-oriented thinking, and far too
from simple writing and clear sentences. Closer, much closer to ascending stairs
and the lightest, deepest free fall. I don’t want to let go of that just yet.
Call me young old.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";"><br /></span><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial";">"The complexity of things - the things within things - just seems to be endless. I mean nothing is easy, nothing is simple" (Alice Munro)</span></blockquote>
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<!--StartFragment-->
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Ana</span><!--EndFragment-->
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-15262223008012488962016-09-27T13:50:00.000-07:002016-09-27T13:56:03.060-07:00Thoughts about Brexit and political correctness - Exeter Stands Together Event II<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA2v1jPximDgsQG0wAasuyo-WdQFTqg45aLycfjrvWn0HVBgJjRoESvF8i_ZE4XNDEHc2heXaKo3p7HbhmXP4Y0y_lOa8FiuJT533baYd6EfwoobYh7OJWBUgAMDWEPyPNvXj4wjqmvQg/s1600/ana.singing.speaking.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA2v1jPximDgsQG0wAasuyo-WdQFTqg45aLycfjrvWn0HVBgJjRoESvF8i_ZE4XNDEHc2heXaKo3p7HbhmXP4Y0y_lOa8FiuJT533baYd6EfwoobYh7OJWBUgAMDWEPyPNvXj4wjqmvQg/s320/ana.singing.speaking.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Since Brexit,
there has been an
i<a href="http://www.aljazeera.com/news/2016/06/brexit-increase-racist-attacks-eu-referendum-160628045317215.html" target="_blank">ncrease in racist attacks, violence, intimidation and calls of “Go Home”directed at minorities in the UK</a>. But surely what we call an “increase” in
this case is not really an increase, but the eruption of something that was
already there to begin with. Brexit has allowed some of us to abandon polite
exchange or just plain silence and to replace it with the repressed: abuse,
hatred, racism, sexism, and fear of the other. This wasn’t something new
developing overnight as the votes were being counted. It was already there,
lodged in them, in us. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Brexit has made me
consider political correctness as a form of tacit control that does not
necessarily allow us to overcome racism, sexism and hatred, because it does not
lead to the kind of open, shame-free dialogue that enables unheard voices to
rise up in protest and provocation, and for actual learning to take place.
Political correctness, or what the Marxist theorist and cultural critic Slavoj
Zizek calls “enforced niceties,” but which could also be called a protective
shield, works very much like a disappearing act: what disappears and retrenches
is white privilege, racism and sexism. Brexit has made me consider the
possibility that the liberal tolerance that is the result of our world of
enforced niceties may not be the best or most productive way of ending
discrimination and violence. On the contrary, liberal tolerance can sometimes
in fact lead to, and reinforce, zero tolerance of the other, because what we
want from the other is that he or she abides by the enforced niceties or
pretences created and patrolled by us. In other words, we want the other to be
by our side, but only if he or she is deprived of his or her “otherness.” The
banning of all problematic language, problematic clothing, controversial jokes,
satire around certain topics at home, in the media, at the university, in
political debates, in events such as this one, usually results in the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">enforcement</i> of love, respect and empathy
for the other. Whether or not this enforcement actually brings us closer together
through dialogue and debate is something I’m not sure about.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="line-height: 150%; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
</div>
<ul>
<li>How can we take responsibility
for the divisiness of politics that we are witnessing?</li>
<li>Should we be sacrificing
everything that sounds racist and sexist?</li>
<li>And doesn’t this sacrifice betray
a retreat from disturbing the actual causes of racism and sexism? Doesn’t this
betray a refusal to go the bottom of the question?</li>
<li>Are appeals to democracy a way
of avoiding conflict?</li>
<li>Are we too afraid to risk
divisiveness?</li>
<li>What do we really mean by inclusion?</li>
</ul>
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-89923166866489213222016-09-27T13:43:00.001-07:002016-09-27T14:02:27.016-07:00Thoughts about Brexit and privilege - Exeter Stand Together Event I<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv740MM0b6p_Sj8hGY40bJsThIlQQC5iSbniAwZvB5MxbP660aucimQQU6c7s720TepM8c5EmxtH3OYMDzU1OxauIqcS9LZmB8ruRQdO0ESjFtOfIw2IqLtUuYk4X1DgCxJmL6OV_g2Rk/s1600/13533194_10156973035150234_7571034544609164473_n+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv740MM0b6p_Sj8hGY40bJsThIlQQC5iSbniAwZvB5MxbP660aucimQQU6c7s720TepM8c5EmxtH3OYMDzU1OxauIqcS9LZmB8ruRQdO0ESjFtOfIw2IqLtUuYk4X1DgCxJmL6OV_g2Rk/s320/13533194_10156973035150234_7571034544609164473_n+%25281%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<o:p></o:p><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">I am a Portuguese migrant.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">But to say this is
not enough. Let me try again. I am a Portuguese migrant who lives in a pretty
comfortable situation in the UK. I am not a jobless migrant. I have a stable
job that can’t be performed by someone who does not speak Portuguese, which
means that I am not seen as a direct threat either to England’s self-defined
identity or to most jobless British people. I have never been a victim of explicit
racial abuse, mainly because I am white enough, wealthy and healthy enough, heterosexual
enough, young enough, and I don’t stand out too much from the crowd, or speak
too differently. People don’t stop me in the street to ask if they can touch my
hair or where I come from, and whenever I search for a new place to rent, I am
looked upon favourably by the landlord simply because of my university email
account. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">To say that I am a
Portuguese migrant is, therefore, not enough to explain my situation of
privilege. As a trilingual, highly educated white woman, working, playing and
paying her taxes in this country, I am what some call a “wanted migrant.” My
body is not entirely out of place. This needs to be said, because a migrant is
rarely thought of as white, and white people tend not to be seen as migrants.
They can be expatriates, guests, tourists, or professionals who fancied a
change of scenery, but not migrants. Migrants are defined by skin colour,
discrimination, and, to be sure,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">I did not die or
drown at the border, trying to get in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Instead, I woke up
one fine morning in 1986, to find out that I was already inside the barbed-wire
fence. I was 6 when Portugal, without the help of a national referendum, became
a EU member. This allowed me to arrive in this island by plane, and under the
life-changing, eye-opening, wonderful European Erasmus Exchange Programme, back
in 2000. I didn’t know it at the time, but that year spent in Manchester,
funded partly by the EU, and mostly by the Bank of Mum and Dad, would change my
life dramatically. Although I had studied English in Portugal for two years, I
spent the first three months of my Erasmus life unable to understand a word of
Mancunian, and wondering why bus drivers loved me so much, with their “Hello,
luv” greetings. I came back to Portugal at the end of 2001 to finish my Coimbra
degree, and I eventually found a job as a teacher. I enjoyed teaching, but I was
restless and I wanted to carry on studying, so by 2004 I was back in
Manchester, this time with the emotional/professional support of my supervisor
and friend Hilary Owen, and the financial help of the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Fundação para a Ciência e a Tecnologia</i>, the national funding agency
under the responsibility of the Portuguese Ministry of Science, Technology and
Higher Education, who would pay for my MA and PhD fees, accommodation and
travel expenses in the next five years. The Foundation’s budget encompasses
funds from the Portuguese state budget and from European structural funds, so
once again I found myself living in the UK because of Portugal’s EU membership.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Although I am the
embodiment of a generation of ambitious, cosmopolitan Portuguese who grew up flirting
with the idea that we were all European, I do not think that the EU is perfect.
Portugal exited its bailout programme in May 2014, but the country <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/business/2016/04/11/germany-tells-greece-it-needs-to-do-more-as-debt-talks-stutter-a/">will
continue to face the consequences of aggressive austerity measures</a> imposed
by Europe for years to come. Angela Merkel’s official response to the migrant
crisis is for EU members to pull together and provide shelter for people
fleeing war or persecution, but <a href="http://www.reuters.com/article/us-europe-migrants-fences-insight-idUSKCN0X10U7">most
members have failed to do this</a>, building anti-immigrant fences instead. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Having said that, even
Portuguese film director Miguel Gomes latest film trilogy, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Arabian Nights</i>, which was produced as a response to the austerity
measures forced on Portugal by the EU, even that trilogy is a European
co-production, with money supplied by France and Germany!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">So, in my
experience, the advantages of standing together truly exceed the disadvantages.
I have benefitted tremendously from living in this country, and that is the
reason why I am still here and not elsewhere. I cannot stress enough the
importance of the kind of support I have received in England in terms of
education and training, career advancement opportunities, and above all, emotional
bonds, all of which have allowed me to grow and thrive in a foreign country. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">But I also like to
think that the UK has benefitted, if only modestly, from my partly
Portuguese-funded, partly EU-funded immigrant life. As a university lecturer I am
committed to making diversity a priority, not only in terms of the courses I
offer, but also in terms of going out of my way to pass on to my mostly British
students the notion that striving for inclusion and balance will lead to
empowering and real changes in their lives. As a researcher, I spend an
increasing number of days thinking about how to connect with the local
communities, how to democratise access to knowledge, how to bring diverse
voices and experiences into my research. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Brexit is not the
result that universities hoped for. I am particularly concerned about what it
will mean in terms of:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "symbol"; text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span><span lang="EN-GB" style="text-indent: -18pt;">Racial abuse: the referendum
has given the minority an excuse to voice hatred and anti-immigration
discontent. We have just heard of an increase in ugly incidents such as the
case of Fátima Lourenço, a Portuguese migrant living in South London, who has
suddenly become a target for racist attacks in the wake of Brexit (<a href="http://portugalresident.com/post-referendum-racism-sees-portuguese-woman-in-uk-spat-at-and-told-to-go-home">http://portugalresident.com/post-referendum-racism-sees-portuguese-woman-in-uk-spat-at-and-told-to-go-home</a>) </span></li>
<li>What will Brexit mean for
migrants less privileged than myself? How will this impact on the number of
students interested in learning languages?</li>
</ul>
<br />
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB"><o:p> </o:p></span>Furthermore, I am
worried about what Brexit will mean:</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="line-height: 150%;">
</div>
<ul>
<li>In terms of free movement for
students currently on, or preparing for, their year abroad, and especially
those on the Erasmus programme and other educational exchange programmes</li>
</ul>
<br />
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="line-height: 150%;">
Im worried about
what Brexit will mean:</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="line-height: 150%;">
</div>
<ul>
<li>In terms of free movement for
EU colleagues and students: will EU staff and students be able to continue
studying at British universities?</li>
</ul>
I am worried about
issues such as:<br />
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="line-height: 150%;">
</div>
<ul>
<li>EU student fees</li>
<li>the future of EU research
grants</li>
</ul>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Even though we all
know that nothing will change overnight, there is a lot of uncertainty and
anxiety. Brexit provides a real challenge for Modern Languages in particular,
since this is an area that logically benefits from a healthy and open
relationship between the UK and European countries, from collaboration and the
free travelling of people and ideas. Pulling out of the EU is not going to make
any of this any easier. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">But right now, I
think it is time that we stand together, take a deep breath and get ready to
start re-shaping our relationship with Europe. I want to speak out for
responding well and engaging fully. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Other
readings are possible that resist the impulse to be hateful, ungenerous and
bitter</b>. We need to find a new language to deconstruct our privilege and
start crossing borders. This referendum has given us the opportunity of a
lifetime: to think of new ways of opening up to Europe, opening up to the
other, and ultimately to ourselves. And what better way to prepare for this than
start learning a new language? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span lang="EN-GB">I want to end by
quoting a book that I discovered when I first moved to Manchester 16 years ago,
when I first experienced the life of a migrant. The book is by Gloria
Anzaldua’s book, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Borderlands/La Frontera:
The New Mestiza</i>, about her life growing up on the Mexican-Texas border: <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN-GB"><br /></span>
<br />
<div style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“The world is not a safe place to live in. We shiver
in separate cells in enclosed cities, shoulders hunched,
barely keeping the panic below the surface of
the skin, daily drinking shock along with our morning coffee,
fearing the torches being set to our buildings, the attacks in the streets.
Shutting down. (...)<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: white;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Alienated from her
mother culture, ‘alien” in the dominant culture, the woman of color does not
feel safe within the inner life of her Self. Petrified, she can’t respond, her
face caught between<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><em><span style="font-family: "cambria"; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">los intersticios</span></em>, the spaces between the different
worlds she inhabits.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: white;"><br /></span></div>
<span lang="EN-GB" style="color: white;">
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: white; font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The ability to
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<span lang="EN-GB">Thank you for listening.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-27960870967529632222015-12-23T06:55:00.001-08:002015-12-28T09:51:14.378-08:00How to forget about marking and start remembering. Thoughts around a memory research project.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVYuRF4MQGke4x4CTlOGl-IIyj2SLblfHJu_TLml1qelfdZazdfzS-m8WHW5Rh0mOMmUCM0Ab731q0ekmeSC-WlsAJWpZ-nwGwFNFjem2VeSHtUQrZ_kkU166nZv69_gcvUiEQO_59_BQ/s1600/linho.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="277" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVYuRF4MQGke4x4CTlOGl-IIyj2SLblfHJu_TLml1qelfdZazdfzS-m8WHW5Rh0mOMmUCM0Ab731q0ekmeSC-WlsAJWpZ-nwGwFNFjem2VeSHtUQrZ_kkU166nZv69_gcvUiEQO_59_BQ/s320/linho.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 11.0pt;">I
should be marking. But I’m in Portugal, back in my old room, looking at a bed whose
frame my father repainted just to surprise me. I put down my luggage and look
at the dark red and golden frame, remembering the previous colour, a light
pink, the same golden. I like it. I should definitely be marking, but in the evenings my
mother starts remembering her childhood Christmas and tells it to me again, anew.
Combinações de semana de presente, filhoses, o meu avô a virá-las no lume, a
minha avó sempre atrasada, direito a dormir no quarto deles até à meia-noite,
no dia seguinte tangerinas do jardim e um tostão para o menino na capela. Her
intentional remembering is meant to give me a narrative frame so that I can
structure my identity through her remembering of a past I did not experience. Yesterday
I asked her for the photo album, so that I could follow her visually. My mother
resisted this, not getting up. Later, in the middle of another remembering
monologue, she opened a drawer and showed me a piece of old linen for us to
admire together. It must be said that drawers are the true sites of memory
(Nora) in this house. Like all sites of memory, they enclose and express a
collective shared knowledge of the past, on which a group’s sense of unity and
individuality is based (Erll and Nunning 2010). They are points of reference
for those, like me, like all of us, who were born after something took place. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 11.0pt;">So
from the drawer emerged this fabric, rough and soft at the same time. We
touched it, feeling the connections and interactions, the interlacements. I
think this fabric is the frame, the mnemonic template that structures all of my
mother’s memories. Remembering is not the result of a one-way cumulative
traffic inside her or my head. The common view that memory and
forgetting are fundamentally individual experiences was contradicted by Maurice Halbwachs, a French philosopher and sociologist who postulated that we can only remember within the social frameworks which
stimulate us to remember. In this sense, there are no strictly personal memories:
individual memories are socially and culturally shaped. Memory and identity are
constructed by a learning process within a group (the family, social classes
and religious communities), and representations of what the past should look
like are socially inherited. As such, when we remember we are often invoking
existing imagery, borrowing from existing images and narratives from the past.
It is therefore important to compare between old and present ways of
approaching the past. That is what I propose to do in my research project,
dedicated to memory on the collective level, and to cultural remembering as a
transnational, multidirectional phenomenon, in-between Lusophone Africa, Brazil
and Portugal. Do past and present memories resemble each other, do they fit
familiar remembering schemes, similar patterns? Ideally, the project will draw on
novels, short-stories and testimonies, as well as websites, photographs, film
and other visual documents that engage with transnational collective memories
and cultural exchanges. Though I'm still not sure if I will be able to fit it all in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 11.0pt;">I
think Global Memory Studies is the potential main field of my research project,
which aims to produce transcultural memory research. Following the premise that
“memories don’t hold still for their portraits” (Erll 2011: 66), I would like to focus on the
translocal, the transnational and global circulation of mnemonic contents,
media and practices. I'm interested in the dynamic movement of memory
across time and space (Erll 2011: 65). By looking at the world through the
transcultural lens, I want to address the shared sites of memory that
have emerged through slavery, colonialism and travel: how are memories
constituted through movement (of stories across generations of writers, </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 14.6667px;">of photos on the internet, </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 11pt;">of actors across
national cinemas)? Rather than focusing on and describing the alleged origins or
roots claimed by certain social groups, I propose to reconstruct mnemonic
routes taken by certain stories and images, to focus on transcultural movements
rather than national myths about origins.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 11.0pt;">So, yeah. If
only I could forget about marking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-17559690020351961092014-07-03T06:02:00.000-07:002014-07-03T11:11:05.264-07:00Trocado por miúdos: my last talk<div class="MsoNormal">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-zAEIjlZjNW8u3tWtNvqHVKFvwqAcoTF0jsjToaFSDtQWYCCUkdSd53Yj1Sfeo73UZLR9gxKu-u4yAo5bdDfYZJF4b_9OK3caqZj7LiUWEbciDl447ZO59IGNLmwJjAheXPa00abUUOI/s1600/MLM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-zAEIjlZjNW8u3tWtNvqHVKFvwqAcoTF0jsjToaFSDtQWYCCUkdSd53Yj1Sfeo73UZLR9gxKu-u4yAo5bdDfYZJF4b_9OK3caqZj7LiUWEbciDl447ZO59IGNLmwJjAheXPa00abUUOI/s1600/MLM.jpg" height="243" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br />
One question that's been on my mind lately is how we think
about protests, how they work: <b>what makes a real protest, a successful protest?</b> I took
this question as the starting point for a paper that focused on the Portuguese
and Spanish women's movements (linked to second-wave feminism) around 1975. In
order to do this, I drew on two case studies, though I'm only going to write about one of them here. </div>
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This case study was a demonstration organised by the
Portuguese women's movement on 13 January 1975 in Parque Eduardo VII that was
sabotaged by the Portuguese media, leading around 2000 men to appear in the
park to fight the women, hitting them, grabbing their bodies, and attempting to
undress them. I was struck by the way in which most commentators of this
episode describe the demonstration as an event that did not actually happen,
despite the fact that the women appeared with their banners and the symbols of
their oppression in the park, carrying them as they walked through the men.<br />
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<b>So, <i>what if</i> I
assumed for a moment that the protest <i>did
</i>take place and that it was successful</b> (given that it grabbed the attention
of the whole country, and that it even reached other countries, such as
France)? This simple assumption might help me make the most out of what seems
very little. When you work on Portuguese feminism you soon realise the
importance of this kind of exercise. </div>
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Once I stopped denying that the feminists were there, that
they were protesting, I was ready to finally focus on
their <b>bodies in the park</b>. </div>
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Judith Butler's "politics of the street" (2011) guided me
through these women's bodies. For Butler, to appear on the street is not only
to to act together, to accept other people’s perspectives of ourselves and our
bodies on the street, as argued by Hannah Arendt, but it is also to appear
somewhere, which means that we need to pay closer attention to the bodily
dimensions of action. For this understanding to occur, it is not enough to
focus on the struggle between bodies in a given space. We also need to think
about bodies from another perspective: “we have to think," she writes, "about
space as acting on us, even as we act within it” (Butler 2011:6). </div>
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Building on this from my unavoidable post-revolutionary
Portuguese viewpoint, I recast Butler’s politics of the street in the context
of the Carnation Revolution and the ensuing transition to democracy. What kind
of street was produced by the Revolution's political idealism, by the
"miracle" of the supposedly bloodless and peaceful Revolution? What kind of <b>"street lyricism"</b> supported it? And did it play a role in the denial of the feminists' non-lyrical
demonstration?<br />
<br />
Once I translated
Butler’s politics of the street into the context of this lyrical space of
appearance, it became clear that I wasn't writing this paper in a memory void, that
I <i>had</i> a memory of this protest, although I hadn't been born yet when it happened. It strikes me
that the revolution's street lyricism has created an idealised perception of
the space of politics that is able to shape more than we think. Certainly how we remember. <b>We need to
remember better. More creatively, courageously.</b></div>
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-19003156002574212772014-06-09T14:35:00.003-07:002014-06-12T01:50:36.252-07:00O apartamentoGosto desta casa. No outro dia, quando saí para jantar com umas amigas que já não via há muito tempo, uma delas perguntou-me se vivia sozinha. Ela já sabia que eu alugava um apartamento, mas queria confirmar que eu não estava a partilhar com ninguém. Confirmei. Então ela mostrou-me aquele lado dela que é e será sempre o completo oposto de mim, dizendo-me que nunca seria capaz de viver só. Eu disse-lhe que precisava muito da solidão, para me encontrar. Foi aí que me lembrei das nossas conversas, quando éramos as duas muito adolescentes e íamos sempre juntas para todo o lado, dos nossos planos de querermos viver sozinhas antes de nos casarmos. Não sabíamos nada do que nos esperava, mas já nos revoltávamos contra o que esperavam de nós. Revoltávamo-nos desta forma, jurando a pés juntos viver uns anos sozinhas, sem maridos nem filhos, e já empregadas, a ganhar dinheiro e independentes. Olho para esta casa e dou comigo a viver nela o meu plano adolescente. Tão longe da Sertã e do que eu era, mas perto do que eu queria ser.<br />
<br />
Às vezes sinto que nunca parei de ser adolescente, e que o sou sempre mais e mais. Talvez porque nunca o fui como devia ter sido.Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-71154922065103365802014-03-17T15:02:00.002-07:002014-03-17T15:05:12.110-07:00Colóquio Internacional Novas Cartas, Novas Cartografias: Reconfigurando Differenças no Mundo Globalizado<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
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<!--StartFragment--><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: Calibri; line-height: 115%;">E</span></span><span style="font-family: Calibri; line-height: 115%;">m 1951 numa conferência em
Nova Iorque um escritor de ficção científica chamado Theodore Sturgeon disse
que “90% of everything is crap”: the remaining 10% of that is what we call
good, and 10 percent of that – one story in a hundred – is really good. Com isto, estava a tentar dizer que a ficção científica era o único género literário que
era constantemente avaliado mais pelos maus exemplos do que pelos melhores. É o
que ficou conhecido como a Lei de Sturgeon. Algo de muito parecido acontece com
o feminismo, que precisa de ser avaliado pelos seus melhores exemplos, e não
pelos piores. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB" style="line-height: 115%;"><span lang="EN-GB" style="font-family: Calibri; line-height: 115%;">O que me interessava fazer na conferência em Évora, onde estive nos últimos dias, não era tanto aplicar a lei de Sturgeon aos colectivos das Pussy Riot e Femen, coisa que poderia muito bem fazer, até porque há muito de "crappy" no que certas mulheres desses colectivos dizem (principalmente as Femen), mas antes pensar as consequências e as possibilidades abertas pela visibilidade excessiva do corpo feminino em luta
na rua. Queria também debruçar-me sobre a questão do poder dos protestos na rua. </span></span><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">Em Junho de 2012, eu não estava em Portugal, mas vi nascer, através da internet, o movimento social, “Que se Lixe a Troika! Queremos as nossas vidas!”, responsável pela organização de manifestações ou aparições gigantes, como a de 15 de Setembro de 2012, que levou um milhão de pessoas à rua em várias cidades portuguesas num protesto nacional contra as medidas de austeridade impostas pelo governo.</span><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"> </span><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"> </span><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">Ainda assim, como nota uma</span><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"> </span><a href="http://www.publico.pt/sociedade/noticia/centenas-de-pessoas-marcham-contra-a-troika-1610422#/0" style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;" target="_blank">reportagem</a><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"> </span><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">no jornal</span><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"> </span><i style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">Público</i><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">, “eram muitos os que, fora do protesto (de Outubro 2013), o via simplesmente passar: Manifestar-me para quê? O que é que muda?” </span></div>
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Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-47682138459624615062014-03-17T15:00:00.002-07:002014-03-17T15:19:08.917-07:00Breves considerações alentejanas<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">A caminho de Évora, as cegonhas nos ninhos pareciam-se muito mais com avós do que com mães. E a verdura dos pinheiros mansos era consistente com a visão de cabeças penteadas pela cabeleireira da minha mãe, a Dona Dália. Pinheiros muito nineties. A viagem abria-se e trazia-me o mundo meridional, e eu entrava nele com um certo desprendimento e enlevo. Já em Évora, voltei a encontrar os dedos cravejados de anéis da Maria Teresa Horta, e vi como as suas mãos se despegavam do corpo e trotavam pela mesa do colóquio, por aí adiante até chegarem ao que era preciso recusar.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">Agora estou aqui, e gosto de estar aqui, mesmo com os pinheiros, as cegonhas e os anéis trazidos. É</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"> bom regressar a casa depois de tudo isto.</span><br />
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Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-78745132533008291232013-09-22T07:41:00.000-07:002013-09-22T07:47:20.020-07:00 "Lesbian Vertigo: Living the Women's Liberation Movement on the Edge of Europe"<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.25cm;">
<span lang="en-US" style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">As far as I know, I'm the only feminist nerd in my family. So when I went to Manchester it felt like I was opening my eyes for the first time. It was such a big thing for me. I started questioning the church, and the power of those who spoke inside it. I started remembering things. Like being asked to get up and get a fork for my brother at dinner, or being told to clean his room when we went to university, or being unable to acknowledge that I was a sexual being. And yes, I did go through my personal </span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">1970s fit of glory, by</span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;"> taking my life and re-writing the story and changing the ending. </span><span lang="en-US" style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">When I found myself working with Hilary Owen I realised that, without having even planned it,</span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;"> this is where I wanted to be.</span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;"> I was happy, but of course I didn't feel happy. It was all very difficult and most of the time during my MA I felt miserable. The world as I had known it had disappeared, and I had to come to grips with this other world where I had a potential voice to use, if only courage didn't fail me. The truth is </span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">I couldn't disagree loud enough. I was often ashamed of writing articles and getting published on issues that I was unable to tackle with my closest family. I fell into the usual traps of transforming books about other women's experiences into mirrors for my own life. I also discovered another difficulty, which came attached to the situation of being supervised by a brilliant academic: being massively influenced by your mentor's ideas. As a PhD student, I didn't give this much thought, as I was young and naive, and I knew very little to the point of actually believing I was breaking totally new ground (Ha!) </span><br />
<span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;"><br /></span>
<span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">I'm now at a point where I think I know nothing. So the issue of influence was very much on my mind this summer, as I was writing a piece on <i>Novas Cartas Portuguesas</i> and <i>Borderlands: La Frontera</i>. These books had a huge impact on me as </span><span lang="en-US" style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">an MA student at Manchester in 2005. </span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">So what do you do when you feel massively influenced by your own mentor's readings? You just keep on writing, hoping that someday you'll eventually find your way. </span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">My article, "Lesbian Vertigo: Living the Women's Liberation Movement on the Edge of Europe" is a tribute to Hilary Owen, who introduced me to these two books 8 years ago. It's about the impact of feminist ideals on the different stories of canonisation of these books and it will come out in a book edited by Kristina Schulz.</span><br />
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Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-48894360807655285262013-09-21T08:55:00.000-07:002013-09-21T10:10:09.854-07:00The Marias of the Portuguese Communist Party<br />
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<span style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 1.25cm;">Despite
its progressive political agenda, the Portuguese First Republic was
an unstable period that brought political instability and social
unrest, paving the way for the longest right-wing dictatorship in
Europe, which lasted for 48 years (1933-1974). </span><span style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 1.25cm;">The rise to power of
António de Oliveira Salazar, a right-wing economist and a Coimbra
University professor turned dictator, made it more difficult to
invoke the feminine independently of state propaganda. Salazar ruled
Portugal between 1933 and 1968, following the 1926 coup which led to
the creation of the New State. After reportedly falling from a chair
and suffering a stroke, he was replaced by Marcelo Caetano in 1968,
who stayed in power until the Portuguese “Carnation Revolution”
of April 1974, which ended the dictatorship and the Colonial Wars in
Africa. </span><span style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 47.24409484863281px;">In
this repressive context, the 1930s and 1940s witnessed the first
great wave of female authored fiction in Portugal, a phenomenon which Ana Paula Ferreira compares to that which would take place after the Portuguese
1974 Revolution (Ferreira 2002: 15). Writing under the label
“literatura feminina”, these women strategically appropriated the
“feminine” cause of Salazar to explore crucial social and ethical
issues related to the role of women within the family and the nation. </span><br />
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="en-US">In Manuela Porto's 1945 short-story “Maria”, the main character
values maternity as the only way in which she can fulfill herself in
the context of the New State regime. What this praise of motherhood
reveals is not, however, a passive conformity to prescribed social
roles but a desire to hold a mirror to the established order which
privileges a model of passive motherhood. Porto excels in her
depiction of a rather ambivalent relationship with motherhood which
leads her to commit suicide once she realizes she cannot become a
mother. Porto's short-story “Maria” denounces the suicidal
despair experienced by Portuguese women who find themselves locked in
their roles as wives and mothers of the nation.</span><br />
<br />
The
history of Portuguese anti-fascist struggle throughout the 1960s and
1970s would throw back the echoes of Porto's 1945 frustrated Maria.
The waves of unrest fueled by student uprises felt throughout the USA
and western Europe in the late 1960s, and the ensuing fight for
equality between the sexes, were not immediately felt in Portugal. In
this isolated corner of Europe, efforts were initially directed at
fighting back fascism and colonialism, not gender or class
inequality. This is attested by the growing politicization of
universities in Portugal throughout the 1960s, which led to the
radicalization of opposition to the regime, but not to an open debate
around questions raised by women's position within the socialist
opposition, as was happening beyond the Portuguese borders. As noted
by Graça Abranches, “We find no women's collectives within the
students' movement – as was to be expected, when no such thing as a
women's movement existed in Portugal at the time” (Abranches 1998:
5). The censors of the regime regularly examined books and articles
published internationally, and suppressed parts that were considered
obscene before allowing their publication in Portugal. These
suppressions included references to discussions on abortion abroad,
and the work of influential women such Simone de Beauvoir, Betty
Friedan and Kate Millet. The New State ideology forbid the distribution of the contraceptive
pill in the Portuguese territory, emphasizing instead the
reproductive function of female sexuality.<br />
<br />
<span lang="en-US">Despite
this repressive environment, Portuguese women played a central role
in clandestine activities organized by the Portuguese Communist party
(PCP) before 1974, and were, as a result, regularly imprisoned and
tortured by the infamous Portuguese secret police (PIDE). As noted by
Tavares, the clandestine activities of the PCP were often conducted
from so-called “casas do partido” [party's houses], regular homes
turned into political hubs of subversion. Although women's role in
these houses was pivotal for the success of the Communist opposition
to the regime, their efforts were hardly ever acknowledged by men,
and they faced constant discrimination in the name of an “utopia
política que poderia um dia mais tarde resolver todos os problemas”
[political utopia that might one day solve all problems] (Teresa
Almeida quoted in Tavares 2009: 153). Because their true identity had
to be hidden, these women were often referred to simply as “Maria”: </span><br />
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span>
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span lang="en-US">“Eram tratadas simplesmente por 'Maria' por muitos dos seus
camaradas e as suas funções mais valorizadas eram as tarefas
caseiras” [They were treated simply as “Maria” by many of their
comrades and the tasks performed by women that were most valued were
domestic] (Tavares 2009: 152). </span></blockquote>
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="en-US">The image of these silent 'Marias',
looking over the shoulders of their comrades as they cooked their
meal and fed their children is very significant, since it exemplifies
the marxist female ideal underpinning the “original position” of
the Communist community, which demanded women to be as tough as men,
while accepting all the traditional burdens of womanhood. This
exemplifies how Portuguese women's self-perception as feminists was,
once more, reinforced by a masculinist liberation movement's
inability to accommodate women's issues, this time in the context of
the fight against the right-wing dictatorship and the Colonial War in
Africa.</span><br />
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span><span lang="en-US" style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">In
this context, the writing process of </span><span lang="en-US" style="text-indent: 1.25cm;"><i>Novas
Cartas</i></span><span lang="en-US" style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">,</span><span lang="en-US" style="text-indent: 1.25cm;"><i>
</i></span><span lang="en-US" style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">which started in May 1971, may be best described as a collective cry of three Marias
not only against fascist national isolation and repression, but also
against a general silence on gender issues imposed by the marxist
male opposition to the regime. As co-writers, they refuse the ideal
of femininity offered by their comrades. The (very different)
feminisms of the three writers were affected by the Portuguese
marxist community as an oppositional protest movement that fought for
the liberation from oppression without accommodating a feminist
agenda. The fact that the women would later be internationally known
as the “three Marias” is an ironic detail that, far than simply
confirming the feminist co-opting of the book as a simplified
political symbol of sisterhood, instead emphasizes the
book's deliberate violation of the tacit conventions of the
anti-fascist contract of “fraternidade”, responsible for the use
of the “Maria” epithet in the first place.</span>Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-70741755253993913852013-09-13T11:00:00.000-07:002013-09-17T16:11:59.636-07:00Carolina Beatriz Ângelo: a Portuguese feminist icon<br />
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<a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/db/Carolina_Beatriz_%C3%82ngelo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/db/Carolina_Beatriz_%C3%82ngelo.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US">Like
other Portuguese feminist women in the early twentieth century, Carolina Beatriz Ângelo participated actively
and symbolically in the implementation of the Portuguese Republic. She wrote
against monarchs while helping to sew and embroider the national
flags that were raised in Lisbon in 1910. She formed the Portuguese
Group of Feminist Studies, and the Association of Feminist Propaganda
with Ana de Castro Osório, another outstanding feminist personality
and founder of the first feminist association, <i>The Portuguese Group
of Feminist Studies</i>, in 1907. Ângelo, who obtained her degree in Medicine when she was 24 years
old, became a pioneer of women's suffrage in 1911 when she used the
electoral law to ask for permission to register for the vote. The law
offered the vote to all Portuguese citizens without mentioning
gender. It required that, in order to vote, one had to be head of
household and literate in Portuguese. As a widow with a child to
support, Ângelo fit in all the requirements, and she succeeded in
becoming voter no. 2513, as head of her family. Two years later,
however, the Republican party decided to change the electoral law by
stating clearly that the vote was available to male heads of
household only. Portuguese women were thus denied a place and a say
in the public sphere by their male Republican partners, on the basis
of the supposed 'religious fanaticism of the women, which would
constitute a hindrance to Republican values' (Esteves 1998: 74 in
Pereira 2006: 190). </span>
</div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US"> Nevertheless,
the international impact of Ângelo's vote was very strong. Because
of her achievement, Portugal was seen as a pioneer country in what
regarded women's suffrage. The news was welcomed by feminists all
over Europe, who sent telegrams and letters to the Association of
Feminist Propaganda congratulating Ângelo.<a class="sdendnoteanc" href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3744855418499671843#sdendnote2sym" name="sdendnote2anc"><sup>ii</sup></a>
Portugal was seen as a symbol of hope for the women's first-wave
community, and a country of feminist possibility. Graça Abranches
(1998) has suggested that, although it would be tempting to draw a
parallel between the organized and vocal feminist movement of the
First Republic and the notoriety achieved by the case of </span><span lang="en-US"><i>New
Portuguese Letters </i></span><span lang="en-US">in 1972, the
parallel cannot be drawn “because of the nature of the regime”
(Abranches 1998: 6). While I agree that the political differences
need to be taken into consideration, since Portugal's fascist
dictatorship prevented women in the early 1970s from organizing a
women's movement as had been done at the turn of the century, an
important parallel remains to be drawn here, I believe, in terms of
the consequences of the international impact of Portuguese feminist
actions for the self-fashioning of Portuguese women as feminists. </span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
What is interesting about this episode, which signals a Portuguese relationship with the international world
of feminist solidarity politics – a version of which would be
re-enacted in the 1970s, with the publication of <span lang="en-US"><i>New
Portuguese Letters</i></span><span lang="en-US"> – is that it was
largely at odds with the kind of feminist thought that was actually
being produced in this country. Portugal was (momentarily)
transformed into an international political symbol of feminist unity,
despite the fact that, as described by Margarida Pereira (2006), the
writings of Portuguese early feminists transpired a strong sense of
morality “denoting a conservatism that is very far removed, for
example, from the political commitment of English suffragettes”
(Pereira 2006: 187). Pereira posits, correctly, that Portugal's rigid
Catholic morality hindered women's access to education, so that when
feminism reached Portugal at the turn of the twentieth-century only a
handful of women, mainly from the privileged classes, got involved in
claiming the feminist label.<a class="sdendnoteanc" href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3744855418499671843#sdendnote3sym" name="sdendnote3anc"><sup>iii</sup></a>
Pereira goes on to argue that, while this may explain why early
Portuguese feminists were particularly vocal about the right for
women's education, it does not entirely account for the fact that the
early Portuguese feminist fight was one for social, rather than
political rights. To her mind, the fact that Portuguese feminism
involved a celebration of women as mothers, wives and educators
stands as an</span><span lang="en-US"><b> </b></span><span lang="en-US">“ideological
contradiction” (Pereira 2006: 187). However, this assessment
reveals, in part, a perception of the Portuguese feminist movement as a mere
version of someone else's (in this case, a version of English
suffragettes') feminism. I suggest, instead, that the early
Portuguese feminist emphasis on the link between female autonomy and
the social role of women as nurturers and supporters of their
families and communities may be read as an early articulation of the
</span><span lang="en-US"><i>distinctive</i></span><span lang="en-US">
character of the Portuguese feminist experience, which involved an
early refusal to choose between identity politics (being a Portuguese
woman) and political praxis (being a feminist). </span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US">When Portuguese
feminist Virgínia de Castro e Almeida writes in 1913 that “the
noblest missions of a woman are, undoubtedly, love, motherhood, and
education” (in Pereira 2006: 187), she is articulating a perspective that takes into account the specificities of the
Portuguese female experiences along economic, cultural, political and
social lines. The feminist movement of the First Republic, with the story of Ângelo's vote at its core, inaugurates –
despite the context of strong international pressure to transform
Portugal into a symbol of international feminism – a Portuguese
female tradition of reclaiming a specific historical position <i>that differs from</i> the notion of a universal feminist sisterhood. This situation may have
contributed to shaping a Portuguese feminist consciousness whose
contours can be observed in the decades following the Three Marias' notorious case. </span><br />
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="en-US">More research is needed on this front! How did Portuguese women </span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">(re)create themselves as feminists throughout the
twentieth century and especially in the 1970s? </span><span style="text-indent: 1.25cm;">How
did they relate to pre-existing social groups, and to the feminist
international community in particular? What kind of alliances with
other feminists beyond the national borders did they forge, and what
were the consequences of those alliances for their self-perception as
feminists?</span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US"><br /></span></div>
<div align="JUSTIFY" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span lang="en-US">Notes</span></div>
<div id="sdendnote1">
<div class="sdendnote">
<a class="sdendnotesym" href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3744855418499671843#sdendnote1anc" name="sdendnote1sym">i</a>Ana
de Castro Osório published <i>As Mulheres Portuguesas</i> in 1905, the
first Portuguese feminist manifesto where she emphasises the need to
educate women. She also defends that women should work outside the
home and be independent. Osório also became involved in the
National Council of Portuguese Women, an umbrella organization for
women's groups, later closed down by the Salazar regime in 1947. See
Wayne 2011: 371.
<br />
<br /></div>
</div>
<div id="sdendnote2">
<div class="sdendnote">
<a class="sdendnotesym" href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3744855418499671843#sdendnote2anc" name="sdendnote2sym">ii</a>Interview
with Manuela Tavares in <i>Câmara Clara</i>, 'Ser Feminista é
querer ser pessoa', 9 October 2011
<<span style="color: navy;"><span lang="zxx"><u><a href="http://camaraclara.rtp.pt/#/arquivo/228">http://camaraclara.rtp.pt/#/arquivo/228</a></u></span></span>>
Accessed [15 April 2013].</div>
</div>
<br />
<div id="sdendnote3">
<div class="sdendnote">
<a class="sdendnotesym" href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3744855418499671843#sdendnote3anc" name="sdendnote3sym">iii</a><span lang="en-US">Illiteracy
rates were high, and most Portuguese women were unskilled workers
throughout the first half of the twentieth-century. </span>In 1940,
56,1% Portuguese women and 41.2% Portuguese men were illiterate. In
Maria Cândida Proença. <i>História. O Estado Novo. Materiais para
Professores</i>. Lisboa: Instituto de Inovação Educacional,
Ministério da Educação. 1997: 64, in Ferreira 2002: 26. </div>
</div>
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-60791906595620168172013-08-14T11:16:00.001-07:002013-08-14T11:17:36.566-07:00precarious persistence<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.exeterexpressandecho.co.uk/images/localworld/ugc-images/276269/Article/images/19634296/5154672.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.exeterexpressandecho.co.uk/images/localworld/ugc-images/276269/Article/images/19634296/5154672.jpg" style="-webkit-user-select: none;" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
As I look at the vicious seagulls that populate the skies of a city I still don't understand, I feel vulnerable. To feel vulnerable here is to realise that without this pavement, my body would not be able to move. But the pavement is here. And as my feet touch it, I walk, one step at a time. I have all the surfaces at my disposal. They are here to help me touch, eat, drink, hear, sleep, wash, feel. It is different from the kind of vulnerability I felt when I was on vacation. To feel vulnerable then was to experience a certain desire for immobility once I thought that I was standing upside down from the point of view of a map of the planet Earth. But back to this place called Exeter. A talk about vulnerability comes to my mind as I walk. It was a talk I was privileged to access, simply because I had a Raven account. A Raven account is another kind of pavement that helps you get noticed. Judy felt too vulnerable about her work and did not want it to reach the ears of the world just now. So the wisdom landed on Cambridge and was sealed in. Yes I understand. Sometimes when I walk I also hold my breath when people pass me by. I do that to close some form of secret pathway into me. But then I have to take a deep breath and take in all that is in the air. Now that I have a window overlooking a new green campus, I can say that behind this window I am experiencing a form of precarious persistence as she said, yes. I am vulnerable to all the people I don't know but know I will meet, and to all the visions of the city I will come to know, and to the agendas of others, and to all the possible failures and successes that are coming my way. It feels like an unstoppable train that makes the pavement shake ever so slightly. That train is always coming, it is not a passing train. And yet I persist, here, avoiding the seagull that comes for my sandwich.<br />
<br />
"Although we often speak as if vulnerability is a contingent and passing circumstance, there are reasons not to accept that as a general view. It is always possible to say: "I was vulnerable then, but I am not vulnerable anymore", and we say that in relation to specific situations in which we felt ourselves to be at risk. They can be emotional situations in which we are very much vulnerable to rejection but later on find that we have lost that vulnerability. Even as it makes sense to speak this way, about episodic vulnerability, it makes equal sense to treat with caution the seductions of ordinary discourse at such a moment. (...) The condition of vulnerability is not in itself precisely changeable, and it is not always known to ourselves. This only means that vulnerability is a more or less implicit or explicit feature of our experience. To say that we are all vulnerable beings is to mark our radical dependency not only on others but on a sustaining and sustainable world. Strength is not the opposite of vulnerability. (...) We must connect to the world we wish to see, or refuse the one that is doing us in. Is this not a form of deliberate exposure, precarious persistence, as the very demand for a livable life? Vulnerable acting." (Judith Butler)Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-80092207790306362222012-10-28T06:20:00.000-07:002012-10-28T06:25:25.886-07:00A cauda<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Escritórios
exclusivos rebrilham na solidão das nuvens</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
enquanto gravatas
edificadas martelam telemóveis</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
à sombra
gherkiniana do cash flow.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Em baixo, por entre as peles de pettycoat lane,</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
ganho nacionalidade de vespa.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Dentes macios sorriem</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
no mercado de prejuízos arredondados.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Na penumbra do
semáforo,</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
de boris bike no bolso,</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
relembro a
esperança que pedala adiante,</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
e que ultraleve
ultrapassa a poluição</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
e sobe aos últimos
andares do Nido</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
e desce em desatino
até ao capacete.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Reparo que pedalo
em unísono</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
com a sua cauda
brilhante.</div>
Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-80085950010628107892012-07-29T11:05:00.001-07:002012-07-29T11:08:05.219-07:00Pussy Riot: the faces of rebellion<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM6q7I5vUAIOq3fXvoG2dyX0K9CmMfthhUZCbF46TytYlPvog09Q6EI3MElQJ63EdamwYR5eU2d5Jr6_0zE2UgswAh3sXmvfiDJugEGG3KRkAi0bc3WudZ0dIId0p_VrqJMfnN8S7vif0/s1600/pussy-riot-3_2267637k.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="278" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM6q7I5vUAIOq3fXvoG2dyX0K9CmMfthhUZCbF46TytYlPvog09Q6EI3MElQJ63EdamwYR5eU2d5Jr6_0zE2UgswAh3sXmvfiDJugEGG3KRkAi0bc3WudZ0dIId0p_VrqJMfnN8S7vif0/s640/pussy-riot-3_2267637k.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div>
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</div>
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<span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">Three young Russian women - Maria Aliokhina, Nadezha Tolokonnikova and Iekaterina Samutsevich - were arrested earlier this year after occupying a cathedral in Moscow to sing a punk prayer against Putin. They are accused of vandalism and religious hatred. If found guilty, they could spend up to seven years in prison. Similarly to what happened to the Three Marias in the 70s, these women's trial has been delayed since February. Let's hope that History repeats itself and that a revolution in Russia is able to suspend the accusation. </span></div>
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<span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">Who said we live in a world beyond gender? New theories of gender must start right here.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; text-align: -webkit-auto;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; text-align: -webkit-auto;">The trial begins on 30 July.</span></div>
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/ALS92big4TY?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
(Chorus)
St. Maria, Virgin, Drive away Putin
Drive away! <span style="background-color: white;">Drive away Putin!
(end chorus) </span><br />
Black robe, golden epaulettes<br />
All parishioners are crawling and bowing<br />
The ghost of freedom is in heaven<br />
Gay pride sent to Siberia in chains<br />
The head of the KGB is their chief saint<br />
Leads protesters to prison under escort<br />
In order not to offend the Holy<br />
Women have to give birth and to love<br />
Holy shit, shit, Lord's shit!
Holy shit, shit, Lord's shit!
(Chorus)<br />
<span style="background-color: white;">St. Maria, Virgin, become a feminist </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">Become a feminist, Become a feminist
(end chorus)
</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">Church praises the rotten dictators </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">The cross-bearer procession of black limousines </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">In school you are going to meet with a teacher-preacher </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">Go to class - bring him money! </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"> Patriarch Gundyaev believes in Putin </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">Bitch, you better believed in God </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">Belt of the Virgin is no substitute for mass-meetings </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">In protest of our Ever-Virgin Mary!
(Chorus) </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;">St. Maria, Virgin, Drive away Putin
Drive away! Drive away Putin!
(end chorus)</span>Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-66175908684644971002012-06-16T05:16:00.000-07:002012-06-16T05:16:05.672-07:00Novas Cartas Portuguesas: The Making of a Reputation<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRsUuHVNlavwEJEuF2KUjiAZ2pFq44yTsbL4cNCN7N0tRGkshyphenhyphenRFiYOacym7Q1iFoDoa5gRwDCOqEAcK2cklKaeAH_dAw8ELTuW6a-Xh1zDwqKqZ6CJBik5OzDeRGaUvpbQARdQMI2wtA/s1600/OA-logo.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="130" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRsUuHVNlavwEJEuF2KUjiAZ2pFq44yTsbL4cNCN7N0tRGkshyphenhyphenRFiYOacym7Q1iFoDoa5gRwDCOqEAcK2cklKaeAH_dAw8ELTuW6a-Xh1zDwqKqZ6CJBik5OzDeRGaUvpbQARdQMI2wtA/s320/OA-logo.png" width="320" /></a></div>
My article on <i>Novas Cartas</i> is now available in the <a href="http://www1.umassd.edu/jfs/issue2/articles/martins.html" target="_blank">Journal of Feminist Scholarship</a> (open-access). Comments are very welcome!<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Ana Margarida Dias Martins turns our attention to the feminist literary and theoretical canon as she focuses on the text </span><em style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Novas Cartas Portuguesas</em><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> (</span><em style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">New Portuguese Letters</em><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">), published in 1972 and co-authored by Portuguese writers Maria Isabel Barreno, Maria Teresa Horta, and Maria Velho da Costa. Martins reassesses the internationalization of </span><em style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Novas Cartas Portuguesas</em><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> in order to understand what forces, both theoretical and political, kept the text from becoming an established part of feminist literary canons in Europe or the United States, while also exposing how it contributed to 1970s feminist intellectual conversations and movement. In doing so, Martins also argues for further reanalysis of </span><em style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Novas Cartas Portuguesas</em><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> in order to understand the often overlooked relationship between French and Anglo-American feminisms and texts from outside the Franco-Anglophone spectrum. </span></blockquote>
<br />Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744855418499671843.post-38426254772200967742012-05-22T05:05:00.001-07:002012-05-22T05:05:04.328-07:00Guinea Bissau (and the Three Marias)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrGGepBIHbIGtuiD74jlqHLSJwtSJ0oWsg5aCy5nf-8Iscb3T6qSXUL2iVux539lQGzs9nFskbOa9-LMwBjbxDcozksLhxXREwBhLZhKK4QOiVO7kNBsH6EBfieb_AZHdHjyQmJHw73Fg/s1600/3751.16.guinea-bissau.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="312" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrGGepBIHbIGtuiD74jlqHLSJwtSJ0oWsg5aCy5nf-8Iscb3T6qSXUL2iVux539lQGzs9nFskbOa9-LMwBjbxDcozksLhxXREwBhLZhKK4QOiVO7kNBsH6EBfieb_AZHdHjyQmJHw73Fg/s320/3751.16.guinea-bissau.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
I've been receiving emails about the situation in Guinea Bissau. No-one seems to know exactly what is going on there, but from what I could gather, it boils down to an explosive mixture of military coups, repressive regimes, great famine, and international silence. The tone of the emails I'm receiving from the academic community in the global north reminds me of the three Marias' worry about what words can do.<br />
<br />
Mas o que podem as palavras? O que podem abaixos assinados, cartas e assinaturas? O que podem campanhas virtuais no twitter contra a fome e o desespero de uma população?<br />
<br />
Talvez possam alguma coisa. Porque é que só intervém o ECOWAS? Onde estão as headlines? Onde está a CPLP? Onde está o UN Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC)?<br />
<br />
<b>Guinea Bissau: the bad news...</b><br />
In nearly 40 years of independence, no elected leader has finished their time in office in Guinea Bissau. It's one of the world's poorest countries, with 70% living in poverty. It's <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/mar/09/drugstrade" target="_blank">the world's first narco state</a>: a hotspot for the smuggling of cocaine from Latin America to Europe. It's heavily dependent on foreign assistance, with a massive foreign debt. It has an issue of impunity, with no prisons. It's considered to be one of the worst places in the world <a href="http://www.africagoodnews.com/development/health/878-beating-infant-mortality-in-guinea-bissau.html" target="_blank">to be a mother</a>.<br />
<br />
<b>Guinea Bissau: the good news!</b><br />
Despite having been dogged by war, coups and assassinations, the country has been making progress to reverse violence and destruction. Young hip-hop artists are <a href="http://www.africagoodnews.com/brand-africa/art-and-culture/662-hip-hop-against-political-violence-in-guinea-bissau.html" target="_blank">speaking out in Kriol</a> against political violence. The House of Mothers is helping women to deliver their babies safely, offering them food and treatment. The UN is helping to<a href="http://www.africagoodnews.com/governance/conflict/1352-un-anti-crime-agency-to-help-set-up-police-academy-in-guinea-bissau.html" target="_blank"> build a police academy</a> so as to better tackle organized crime. Bissau-Guinean <a href="http://explore.theculturetrip.com/africa/guinea-bissau/" target="_blank">Flora Gomes</a> is putting Guinea Bissau on the map of international postcolonial cinema. And so on, and so on, and so on.Anahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01817309937600137787noreply@blogger.com0